


Any Colour You Like

by Attilas_Cupcakes (orphan_account)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Also Gadreel being an utter sweetheart, Alternate Universe - Bakery, And by People I mean Gabriel, Attempted Fratricide, Because Michael Is An Idiot, But Michael Isn't Willing To Ask, By Which I mean He's a Douche, Drug Use, Fluff and Angst, Gabriel is awesome at making them, Gen, Gender Fluid Character, God's A+ Parenting, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, I can't have them, I have made this, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, It is and it Isn't, Like People assuming things they shouldn't, M/M, Michael Would Like A Hug, Part 2, Plot Twist, Previous Drug Addiction, Previous Self Harm, Raphael's got a secret, Sorry Not Sorry, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, This was supposed to happy, actually just me, actually theres just one, and i like it, because i love that, even Sam thinks so, explicit content, he just isn't an asshole, he's not a total sweetheart, lots of pastry porn, mentions of previous child abuse, most of this will take place in the castle, okay I lied, there's castles, which is in the Alps
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-27
Updated: 2014-09-20
Packaged: 2018-02-10 15:02:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 36,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2029461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Attilas_Cupcakes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Well, where do they live?" Sam asked</p><p>Gabriel looked down at the ruined soufflé and shook his head "You won't believe me."</p><p>Sam scoffed "Unless you say Narnia, I'm inclined to believe you."</p><p>"The Alps. Somewhere in the Alps. I never found out exactly where, all I know is it isn't on the Switzerland side." Gabriel answered, switching his gaze to Sam.</p><p> </p><p>Previous title: Heaven Forbid, Heaven Permit. Yeah, I LOST A BET OKAY I'M SORRY FOR SWITCHING TITLES! DON'T LEAVE ME!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You Bake When You're Upset

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Storm89](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storm89/gifts), [Chiefraz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chiefraz/gifts), [so_get_this](https://archiveofourown.org/users/so_get_this/gifts), [crazyfreaklove](https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazyfreaklove/gifts).



> Firstly, this will get hella weird but there's to much angst to call it a crack fic, sorry. Secondly, the first fic is more normal and I'm sorry if this isn't the sequel you wanted but I am too busy to go back and change all this shit now. So, if you're looking for a great sequel you won't find it here. My bad. That being said and you're still here, enjoy my strange writing, darlings.

It had been three days since the morning John Winchester left. Not much had changed, really. In fact things had been easing their way back to normal. 

Except the Novak boys had become the very definition of the word tense and jumped at every tiny sound. But in different ways. Cas would adopt that wide eyed stare and stop moving. Balthazar would lock himself in the nearest room and Gabriel…well, murderous would be a good word for his posture.

Cas had complained that he wasn’t doing anything productive and the bakery was running out of sweets since Gabriel had fired Meg. Which was complete bull but Gabriel had spent the last two days in the kitchen of the small café to satisfy his younger brother. Making everything he knew that could pass for simple. But that didn’t mean that Balthazar who had been purveying his work didn’t eat the ones that were much to fancy for the customers. Or at least thats what Balthazar said as he wrapped his mouth around yet another crème brulee petit fours frais. Gabriel had taken to ignoring him and had put out the petit fours in the display anyway, they were gone within the hour and Gabriel had a smug smile when he took one out of Balthazar‘s hand and shoved the whole thing in his mouth “Don’t care if it’s not simple enough. My shop.” he said around the small pastry, shoving another two trays into Balthazar’s now empty hands and pointing toward the counter. Before starting to make something else.

Gabriel had made at least enough of the regular stuff to fill the demand and had started on things he hadn’t tried making in awhile extending the small menu, according to Balthazar, Dean and surprisingly, Sam his experiments were beyond successful. And Sam, the cheeky fucker, had made rather obscene noises when he took a bite of a raspberry eclair before pecking Gabriel on the cheek and then returned to Little Pricks saying he’d be back during his break. Even Cas had snuck down from the tax paperwork to sneak eight or ten pieces of Divinity.

Gabriel was a bit grumpy when Cas said he shouldn’t eat a lot of his own baking. He replied by shoving a triple chocolate eclair into his mouth then stuck out his tongue. “I do what I want, Cas.” he mumbled and Balthazar returned to the kitchen.

Balthazar raised an eyebrow at his older brother “Don’t talk with your mouth full, Gabriel, it’s disturbing.”

Gabriel shrugged “I live with you and I don’t complain. You steal another one of my canèles though and we’ll be having a talk about how many fingers you want to keep.”

“All. All of them.” Bal answered and took another caramelized treat.

“It’s a wonder I’ve gotten anything sold with you people eating everything I make.” he grumbled whisking the batter in the bowl in the crook of his arm, taking the whisk out to point it at Dean currently behind Cas, shoving his mouth full of Moorkop. The Winchester was caught and he tried to hide behind Cas who had his own evidence around his mouth.

But he came out looking not that apologetic “It’s not my fault!” Dean protested but Gabriel had gone back to whisking and was currently ignoring all of them.

“Why are you baking so much anyway?” Dean asked looking around the kitchen at the cooling treats. Gabriel didn’t answer, checking the oven instead, he set the batter down and got an oven mitt, pulling out the things that looked a bit strange to the rest of the room. Gabriel took out a very odd flavoring, the word ‘Rum’ written on the side and started making small holes to insert the filling. He looked up to all of their skeptical stares and scoffed “It’s called Runeberg’s Torte and they aren’t for any of you. Aren’t you supposed to be at work, Deano?” he explained then snapped.

Cas watched his older brother for a moment then turned to Dean “He bakes when he’s nervous.”

The filling tube clattered and Gabriel was glaring “I do not!” he protested.

“And touchy.” Balthazar added.

“No more sweets for you guys.” Gabriel grumbled from his position, putting the filling back in the pantry and picking up his whisk, twirling the batter with renewed vigor. He also started humming and Cas and Bal looked fairly surprised. Cas blinking rapidly and Bal’s jaw hinging a little.

“Oi, what’d your brother do to him? He hasn’t willingly hummed David Bowie since he was 16.” Balthazar demanded from Dean who shrugged.

“How the hell should I know?” Dean said, before taking the Divinity out of Castiel’s hand. The youngest Novak pouting rather dramatically.

“Oh for the- Get out, you nosy little fuckers!” Gabriel hissed at them

Cas and Dean complied but Balthazar hopped up on the counter and stuck yet another petit fours in his mouth. “You like him.”

“Figure that out on your own, Tarzan?” Gabriel muttered, letting the whisk still so he could examine the batter before getting out a cupcake tray.

Balthazar grinned “Oh, you do. You like him. More than you’re letting on.”

Gabriel said nothing, pouring the batter generously into the allotted spaces. 

“You going to tell him?” Balthazar asked.

He groaned and looked at his little brother, seemingly gauging Balthazar. “If I say yes, will I be allowed to bake in peace?”

Balthazar pretended to look thoughtful, overly frowning before shaking his head “Never.”

Gabriel glared and shoved the batter filled tray into the oven.


	2. Since You Asked So Nicely

By the time Sam got off on his break, it was pouring down rain outside so he had come into the kitchen wet and smelling of spring showers and faint traces of menthol, his hair ruffled and pulled back into what barely passed as a bun and water droplets streaking down his face and neck, soaking through to his shoulders and making his shirt cling around his collarbone. Gabriel’s mouth was dry and he suddenly couldn’t remember why he was baking, why he was doing anything other than climbing Sam. The kitchen was fairly empty. Not as in closing time empty more like everything had been bought empty. Gabriel had three new bowls in front of him, all filled with different types of batter, he smiled at Sam and pushed a tray of Divinity toward him. “Can you take these up to Cas? Don‘t forget to knock, either, Dean is up there.” he asked, setting down one bowl and picking up another.

He watched Sam walk up the stairs and the Winchester stopped midway to turn “Stop staring at my ass.” Sam quipped

He smiled innocently and winked before Sam left his line of view, putting the bowl down and moving to a bubbling saucepan on the stove, he added the bits of chocolate, watching as they melted sufficiently before stirring. He put it with the other ingredients in the soufflé dish, putting that in the oven. Crowley came to stand in the kitchen doorway looking wary of Gabriel.

He looked up at the Scotsman and raised an eyebrow “I’m not going to demand payment, if that’s what you’re waiting for. They aren’t that hard to make. They are right next to you.” he pointed to the turquoise box of Runeberg’s Torte, not bothering to watch the man leave; he stopped and wondered if he should make another batch of Divinity. He’d already made two more trays of canèles although he’d go to prison before saying he made anything for Balthazar. 

When he went to turn away from the counter, he found himself trapped by large arms and a warm mouth pressed to his neck. “Who were you talking to?” Sam questioned his voice vibrating against Gabriel’s neck, making him shiver, his fingers idly finding their way through the henna maze on Sam‘s arm. 

“Crowley. Asked me if I knew how to make a Runeberg’s Torte, I made him a batch.” Gabriel answered, shifting so he pressed back against Sam just _so_. Sam bit down a surprised noise.

“We‘re in public.” Sam stated, he was still crowding Gabriel nonetheless.

“Hardly.” Gabriel reasoned

Gabriel pushed back again, then reached for another bowl but Sam caught his wrist and brought it back, pinning to Gabriel’s chest. “Oh, Samsquatch, didn’t figure you for the bondage type.”

“I‘m not.” Sam denied much too quickly for the answer to be truthful.

“Oh, the lady doth protest too much.” Gabriel teased, letting his head fall back on Sam’s shoulder and Sam chuckled.

“Maybe. You have flour on your face.” Sam pointed out.

“And you’re not standing straight, now that we‘ve pointed out the obvious...” Gabriel shrugged.

Sam smiled and flipped Gabriel then put him up on the table top, moving so he was standing in between Gabriel’s legs. Knocking chocolate chips and almonds over, spilling even more flour. Gabriel lifted his hand up and examined the white chalky substance, rubbing his fingers together before wiping them through the flour again then rubbed them against Sam’s cheek. Sam rolled his eyes before grabbing a few of the semisweet chips and popping them into _that_ mouth, rain droplets still present around the creases of Sam‘s smile, Gabriel watching his fingers and mouth, eyes darkening quickly. He looked up through gleaming eyes “You should stop that.” 

Sam pursed his lips before bringing another small bit of chocolate to his mouth “I should.” and he sucked it into his mouth, tongue flashing out momentarily. “But I think you have a fixation on my mouth so I‘m not going to.” he finished, sounding petulant and tantalizing at the same time.

Gabriel opened his mouth to say something but closed it when Sam licked his thumb and wiped away the flour mark underneath Gabriel’s eye. He swallowed harshly “I don’t- I don’t know what you mean.” Gabriel tried, failing horribly.

Sam raised an eyebrow and smirked “Now, who’s protesting?”

Gabriel twisted his mouth to the side and shook his head. “That doesn’t mea-Oh, damn!” he mumbled looking around Sam and peering to see through the small oven window. The soufflé had deflated. He grabbed the shirt Sam was wearing, fisting it and tugging until Sam’s mouth was over his. He could taste the traces of chocolate and nicotine in Sam’s mouth, chasing it down and licking it all away before pulling back and groaning as his forehead rested on Sam's. “You with your mouth. And fingers. Always distracting me.” Gabriel grumbled but he didn’t look too put out by the thought. 

Sam grinned and looped his fingers into the empty belt loops around Gabe’s waist, bringing their hips flush and faces only millimeters apart. “What was that?” he asked, his voice going much deeper than should be possible.

“Oh, no. I’m not doing this again only to have some family member interrupt us.” Gabriel protested.

Sam sighed and pulled back. “Fine. Speaking of family members, have you heard from your brothers?”

Gabriel rubbed the back of his neck, whimpering when Sam’s larger hand replaced it and massaged the tension out. “No. But considering where they live, it’s not that surprising.” 

He hopped down off the counter and pushed Sam back until he could get around him. He opened the oven and took out the failed dessert, setting it down on the counter.

“Well, where do they live?” Sam asked

Gabriel looked down at the ruined soufflé and shook his head “You won’t believe me.”

Sam scoffed “Unless you say Narnia, I’m inclined to believe you.”

“The Alps. Somewhere in the Alps. I never found out where exactly, all I know is it isn’t on the Switzerland side.” Gabriel answered, switching his gaze to Sam.

Sam smiled, confusion and curiosity melding together in his eyes “Why not the Switzerland side?”

Gabriel opened his mouth but Cas suddenly cleared his throat from the bottom of the stairs, looking flustered. 

He couldn’t help but chuckle at his little brother’s face. It looked like he’d been reminded of the most ridiculous thing he’d done during childhood, brought up by that crazy aunt who’s told the stupid story over and over again, the story itself being exaggerated and growing more embarrassing each time it was retold. He giggled for a bit longer before holding up his hands in surrender. “I won’t tell.” he offered through snorts.

Azazel knocked on the doorframe to the kitchen, waving at Gabriel and Sam. “Came to say goodbye. War needs his Mustang and I need to get back to the shop.” 

Sam simply grinned “Bye, Yellow Eyes.”

Making sure Sam didn’t see, Gabriel stared at the man, lifting a daring eyebrow. But Azazel only smiled and nodded before disappearing from the doorway as if he‘d never been there at all.

Cas looked at Gabriel, peering at him “Where’d you get it, Gabriel?”

Gabriel shrugged “I need specifics, Cas. Use your adjectives and pronouns, baby bro.”

“The money. The tax returns. Even with them, we aren’t making enough with just the café to pay the other bills.” he said, holding up a clipboard.

“Look, what does it matter?” Gabriel snipped,playing on the defensive

“Is it illegal funds?” Cas asked, seriously.

Gabriel gave him his best bitch face “Yes. Yes, it’s my blood money from the diamond mines of South Africa, Cas. Not to mention the Soviet plutonium reserve in Lithuania.”

Castiel just blinked at him before tentatively saying “I do not know if you’re joking or not.”

He rubbed the bridge of his nose and cast a furtive glance at Sam who offered a small smile. “I’m kidding. Its just-It’s not illegal, it’s all clean. And I chose to buy a house and a café, okay? The bills will be paid on time.”

His little brother was clearly not satisfied with that answer but nodded slowly before turning and walking back up the stairs.

Sam’s hand went back to his neck, rubbing the coiled stress away again. Gabriel closed his eyes for a moment or two before opening them and looking at the mess on the table. “Oil.” he answered the question “It’s from oil, mostly. When I first left I figured I’d go look for the old guy, you know? Got as far as India. Well, not really, Dubai to be specific. Met a guy there who handed me the deed to a very productive oil well and said that my father told him to give it to me if I came looking. That it was his going away present to us. I actually refused it.”

Gabriel watched Sam frown “Then how do you have it?”

Gabriel relaxed under his fingertips before shrugging “About a week later the money switched from my father’s bank account to mine before I even noticed. He did it for all of us, early inheritance and of the like. But most of it’s tied up with my account numbers so that makes me acting head of the estates. What I’m using for this place and the house is just _one_ oil rig. He owns, or well now, _I_ own at the very least thirty seven.” 

“So, you are a very rich man?” Sam asked, teasingly.

“Unfortunately.” he answered in mock despair. Sort of mock. A little mock.

“Actually, how late are you working?” Sam inquired, eyes going to the watch ever present on his wrist.

“Not really on the clock now. Why, had something in mind?” Gabriel asked, dumping out the soufflé and putting the bowl in the sink before going back to his other works.

“Not really. I set up the T.V. at the cabin though.” Sam explained

Gabriel grinned “Popcorn and movies sound great to me, kiddo.”

“Mm, yes, you can only come if you bring those éclairs.” Sam sniffed daintily and Gabriel elbowed him in the ribs when he leaned in to peck at Gabriel’s cheek.

Sam frowned and rubbed his side but Gabriel smirked “Since you asked so nicely, darling” his voice dripping with aching sweetness.

“Okay, I’ll be done in a couple hours or so and I’ll pick you up.” Sam replied after thoroughly attending to his vicious wound. Gabriel hummed his agreement, not looking up from the consistency of the batter. Sam stole a chaste kiss before running back out into the rain.


	3. Let's Pretend

Gabriel was done, for the most part. He was waiting on the gateau marjolaine and then he would just go sit out in the café with Balthazar to wait for Sam. Bal came in the kitchen with a green coffee mug in his hands, steam rising from the cup.

Gabriel stretched to see what the cup held but couldn’t “What is that?”

“Mine.” Balthazar answered, greedily taking a gulp of the liquid.

“Well, be like that.” Gabriel frowned, crossing his arms.

They both turned to look when they heard footsteps and voices coming down the stairs, “I already told you it isn’t necessary, Dean.”

“I _know_ that, Cas.” Dean groaned

“Then why do you insist upon going?” Cas asked confusion evident in their brother’s voice. Gabriel and Balthazar shared a look of amusement.

“He wants to go because he’s afraid something bad is gonna happen.” Bal said loud enough for them both to hear.

There was silence and Gabriel just knew they were either making out or eye-fucking, which was completely redundant now that they were together yet it still seemed to happen. Then Cas asked “Is it?”

Bal opted for taking a drink from his mug and Gabriel checked the door out of habit before answering “Dean can come if he wants, Cas.” and that sure as hell didn’t reassure anybody but Gabriel wasn‘t about to paint rainbows for what was better described as a tsunami. The three brothers had decided that they would be going yesterday night and the way Gabriel saw it, Dean would be helpful. If only in the way he was protective of Cas, that was one less thing Gabriel had to worry about while he was there. He grabbed the oven mitt and removed the gateau from the oven and set it on the counter, covering it, planning on slathering the frosting on later. He picked up his own mug and went out behind the counter and handed the cup to Garth and asked for a macchiato then went and sat down at table, Balthazar joining him.

“Was it really necessary to scare them?” Balthazar asked as he sat down.

Gabriel rubbed his forehead and sighed “I didn’t mean too.”

“The fact remains that you did, Gabe.” he pointed out, fingers curling around the coffee cup.

“Well, it’s not like they have nothing to worry about, Bal, we’re going back _there_ , for Christ’s sakes.” he retorted, scowling at the table 

“Cas was never exposed to their…..qualities. He doesn’t know and he doesn’t need to, the verbal abuse damaged him enough.” Bal shoved right back

“You don’t think I know that? Hell, that’s why I want Dean to come. We shouldn’t be going at all.” Gabriel hissed

Bal sighed “We already talked about this. They won’t leave us alone until we do.”

“Maybe I should just sign over the will.” he muttered and jumped when Balthazar slammed the cup down, other patrons looking over before going back to their meaningless conversations.

“No. Do you know what would happen? As much as they deserve it, our other siblings would have no place to go. Because you know damn well Michael would see that no one got a penny.” 

The door opened, letting in cold air and a few raindrop along with a man in a hoodie with a coat over that, Balthazar shared a look with Gabriel before the man pulled the hood off and Balthazar immediately went to find Cas, the man’s gaze following him before he came and sat down at Gabriel’s table.

“Hello Watcher.” Gabriel greeted coldly, even if Gadreel didn‘t get involved in family affairs he still lived with them, knew what they were like and chose to stay.

Gadreel stiffened at the name but said nothing about it “Your animosity is better saved for the others.“ he remained silent for a long while before he stared at Gabriel “You shouldn’t go.” 

Kevin, a college kid that was a roommate of Garth’s in the Ellen’s apartment building, came over a handed the mug to Gabriel and a caramel latte to Gadreel, his brother smiled at the kid and watched in amusement as Kevin blushed and turned to go back to Garth and the counter, bumping into a chair on the way.

Gabriel said nothing about it “By the way, have you gotten your wings?”

His younger brother’s lips twitched, barely concealing a sneer “Yes.”

It wasn’t something they talked about, Michael saying it was a rite of passage and Gabriel knew it was cruel to bring it up; the tattoos were beautiful, yes. But, like Gadreel and Balthazar and possibly Cas, he despised them. Angels were things of myth and strength, defenders. He was just learning that word and its definition; Michael would never accept the syllables as a verb. What would happen was this: The younger would be taken out on a hunt with Michael or Lucifer after weeks of target practice. A successful kill meant wings. Gabriel was aware that only Hester had yet to get hers and with Gadreel and Inias on her defense Michael would be stupid to push. Gabriel had nothing against hunting, nor did his siblings but the manner was….twisted. The old guy had taught them the target was something to be respected and if they did hit the target, the deer or whatever animal had been shot would be used for fur or venison or something as such, Gabriel had always joked that the old guy was Mufasa. But Michael treated it like a sport, a game, and the wings being the prize you earned. He shook his head, trying to escape the revere. 

“Why shouldn’t I go?” he already knew the answer

Gadreel looked at him as such “You hold what they deem as rightfully theirs. And we all know they don‘t share.”

“Really? Wherever did you get that idea?” Gabriel grumbled, taking a drink.

“This isn’t funny.” he growled and Gabriel frowned

“Why are you here? Before them? Why are you still with them in the first place?” Gabe asked, staring at his brother.

Gadreel’s face revealed nothing and he stood, leaving a twenty on the table and looking back toward the counter at Kevin and Garth arguing about something, “There’s no good answer for that.”

“Then give me the bad.”

Dark blue eyes swerved toward Gabriel “If I did endeavor to leave without consent, with all the things I’ve seen, do you think I would make it to past the evergreens? You think they‘ll ask nicely for the will? If you do you‘re a fool.” he put his hood back up and went to walk out into the pouring rain. But Gabriel stood and grabbed his arm

“You at least should have the balls to try.” he challenged, unsure why. None of his siblings deserved Michael or Raphael. He watched Gadreel look to the door before looking back to him.

“What makes you think I haven’t?” Gadreel asked, wrenching his arm out of Gabriel’s grip and heading out into the rain.


	4. Tie Yourself Together

The fan above his head whirred softly and the muffled conversations of day’s events were humming in the background. Still standing where he had stopped Gadreel, he was debating what to do about the warning, maybe he should go to the castle alone. But even though safety for his little brothers was his first concern his mind went to the Last Will and Testament of his father. How was he going to stop Michael? Could he even keep the will in his name? He needed an attorney, someone who would know the ins and outs, the loopholes, someone to help him pull the blindfold over Michael’s eyes, and if not forever, at least for the time being untill he could figure out a way to move the money into separate accounts. One for each Novak. 

“Sam.” he muttered in thought, eyes blurred as he considered getting Sam involved but that would mean taking Sam along, putting the Winchester at risk wasn’t exactly his dearest wish, here. But the laws of the estates were so very easy to get lost in and tie yourself in a knot while not even moving. 

A hand on his shoulder pulled him out of his argument and he tensed, Balthazar’s brows furrowed and moved into his line of sight. He relaxed almost instantly.

“Are you okay, Gabriel?” his younger brother’s voice was soft, gentle like approaching a frightened animal. He scowled and shrugged the hand off. 

“I’m fine.” he growled

“Obviously you’re not.” said Balthazar, firmly. 

“I said I was fine, Bal, let’s leave it at that.” he spat 

He breathed in a couple times before letting the air whoosh from his lungs and mumbled an apology to Balthazar as he sat back down.

“So, you wanna tell me what tall, dark, and silent wanted?” Bal said, taking his own seat.

Gabriel shook his head and brought his mug to his lips, staring at the caffeinated liquid but not drinking. “Warning us. Actually. Can you imagine that? As well as checking out the busboy.” Gabriel snickered at that. “Let it never be said that a Novak passes up an opportunity.”

Balthazar rolled his eyes then looked toward the door “Where would you have gone, Gabe?” he asked, not looking back to Gabriel for an answer. 

It was rhetorical but Gabriel was startled out of his bitterness, considering “You know, I never really know. Let’s call it a habit of mine.”

Balthazar groaned “Will you stop? Enough of the guilt trip already. We talked about this, remember? It was a very touching speech, you almost cried.”

“Pft. Did not.” Gabriel disagreed, finally taking a drink.

“Speaking of denial, have you told the Winchester that you’re in love with him?” Bal asked, timing it perfectly.

Gabriel choked on his drink and stared wide-eyed at Balthazar “I’m not-I don’t- I just met him!”

Balthazar peered at him “Clearly you’ve never seen a Disney movie. Scratch that, clearly you’ve never seen any movie with romance. You admitted to liking him, it‘s pretty much the same thing only more. And you said more. I‘d say loads more. Possibly tons.”

“It is not the same thing! I can’t -I haven’t even had sex with him!” that statement drawing quite a few rude stares.

“You are joking, right? You’re lucky I don’t slap you.” Balthazar replied, annoyed. 

“That isn’t what I meant and you know it. It’s just- I can’t be- I’m not-He doesn’t even-I don’t have to explain anything to you.” Gabriel sputtered out before crossing his arms.

Balthazar looked peeved with the whole conversation “Look, you said he was different? Right? I can’t believe I had to sit and listen to you moon over him for three hours and now you’re suddenly unsure as to whether you can love someone or not? How am I related to you?”

“It was not three hours!” Gabriel hissed over his coffee cup and Bal just shook his head, the door jingling out the arrival of the man of the hour. 

Sam grinned at Gabe, shrugging off a jacket and putting it on a coat rack by the door then went to the counter, ordering something. Gabriel’s stomach doing weird little flips and drops as if it had been years-and wasn't that so damn corny- since he’d seen his…boyfriend? Lover? Certainly not “person I happen to like very much.“ He gave Balthazar a look but the younger Novak had already started sauntering (and that’s all he ever did, walking was for the mundane) toward the kitchen. Sam took the empty chair and Garth came over, handing him a hazelnut latte, giving a sheepish grin, and then scrambling back to behind the counter. 

“You alright, Gabe? You look like you saw a ghost.” Sam asked, popping the lid off the latte, making it cool faster.

“Oh, yeah, you know, just one of my brothers stopped by, that’s all. Samsquatch, you studied law, right? Know anything about wills?” he asked, smoothing over Gadreel’s visit as nothing but Sam just smirked.

“Yes, a little bit. Which brother?” he asked, sticking his finger into the white whip cream foam of the latte then proceeding to lick it off. The bastard. 

Gabriel shifted in the suddenly uncomfortable chair “Gadreel. How much is a little bit?”

“Remind me, which one is he?” Sam asked, smirking. He knew exactly what he was doing, Gabriel thought correctly.

“Quiet. Reads all the time. Keeps Metatron in place for Michael, mostly. Now, how much is a little bit?” Gabriel threw out the half revised summary of Watcher before steering back to the answers he wanted.

Sam nodded, appeased, taking a sip then answering “The basics, I suppose. I was studying to be a defense attorney, but enough I could probably know a flaw in the construction, why? Want me to look something over?” 

“I don’t have it with me exactly.” Gabriel said sarcastically.

Sam shrugged “The house?”

“Try the Alps, Samsquatch.” he answered, dryly and Sam paused, like he wanted to ask something more but just nodded, accepting the answer. 

“You ready?” he stood, walking to the door and getting both their jackets. Gabriel stood up, going with him out into the rain, the red Camaro right in front of the shop, Sam lit a cigarette then opened the car door for Gabriel, like the first time.


	5. You know You're Going To

The drive to the cabin was fairly quiet, it was dark out now but the rain had yet to let up, Gabriel taking his spot next to Sam and a touch of desperate closeness coming off in waves. Sam said nothing, moving so Gabriel could get closer and wrapping an arm around him. The visit had obviously bothered him more than he was saying but Sam wasn’t going to push the subject.

When they hit the dirt road, Sam turned off the radio and let the dead bud of cigarette fall to the ash tray and started rubbing soothing designs into Gabriel’s shoulder. “You okay?”

“Yeah, no. I just-Heh, it’s nothing.” Gabriel answered quietly.

Sam glanced at him, nosing at Gabriel’s cheek “C’mon, what’d you do with Gabe?”

He sighed “I’m sorry, Sam, I’m worried. I won’t be very good company.”

He was startled by Sam’s laughter and looked somewhat affronted before Sam shook his head. “Gabriel, you don’t have to be happy all the time. I’m an adult.” then he made vague motions with his hands before continuing “I can handle a little gloom and doom.”

“Well, how about a lot?” he asked, burying himself into Sam as the rain pattered on the car , a bit harder than actuality simply because of the speed Sam was going.

“I’ll take anything you give me.” Sam said, but he wasn’t looking at Gabriel and he seemed unsure of saying the wrong thing but Gabriel just waggled his eyebrows.

“Anything, Samsquatch?”

“Anything.” Sam repeated, looking down at him and Gabriel had that certain crooked smile on his lips. Sam felt his chest constrict “Seriously, though, what’s up?”

“I don’t think Bal or Cas should go but there’s no way they’d agree not to.” Gabriel answered

Sam remained quiet and they were drawing closer to the path to the cabin. “Why don’t you won’t them to go?”

“My other siblings are a bit….ambiguous.” Gabriel tried and that was as hidden as possibly. Sam seemed to get that, not pushing too much but a little.

“About what?” Sam asked, slowing down some, the red needle going backwards.

Gabriel shifted against him, “Everything. Mostly their morals. If I go-When I go I should take some kind of….defense.”

Sam hit the brakes softly before sending a worried look his way “Like a weapon, Gabe? What the hell, they’re your family.”

“Yeeeaahh, they don’t look at it that way.” Gabe said, his fingers drumming against his knee

Sam licked his lips “Do you have to go?”

Gabriel smirked “Worried about me?’

“Uh, yeah. You wanna bring a gun and you find it surprising that I’m worried?” Sam said as he parked “Can you just answer me, do you really have to go?”

He sighed through his nose and got out, standing in the soft spray of rain, and Sam following. When they were both on the path he linked their hands “Yeah, I do, kiddo. This is important.”

“Cas and Bal won’t let you go alone, plus Dean said he was going. You'll be fine, Gabe.” and Gabriel waited for him to offer to go along but he seemed to be holding that back. Gabriel knew he was being selfish, Sam had taken the first step in Adam and Manny’s apartment; he needed to be the one to ask Sam, not the other way around.

“How are your uh your dreams?” Gabriel asked, running a hand through his wet hair as they turned the bend and the view knocked his breath out again. Oh, yes, the daylight enriched the view wonderfully. But the moonlight made him take a step back at its shadowed trance. It looked like a private Shangri-La with the haze of rain rippling through the lake and the wind making the many branches bow to its whim and the moon lighting the water, the entire scene as if it couldn't even be any other way, denouncing the daylight. It was so different from the castle and his worries seemed to wash away with the rain, his hand automatically tightened in Sam’s.

Sam smiled brightly “Not that bad, actually.”

He smiled back, reaching up to capture Sam’s lips, Sam went to deepen it but Gabriel pulled away, grinning mischievously. Sam took a step and caught his jacket but Gabriel slipped it off and walked a bit away, still smiling. 

“Gabe, you’ll get sick.” 

“Well, you make everything better so I got nothing to worry about, Samsquatch.” he said, taking another step back when Sam went to wrap the jacket around him, playful eyes daring Sam. There was a moment when they both were unsure what exactly they were doing then Gabriel took off down the path, running and being chased by Sam. He fell half way there, mud splattering on his clothes, Sam catching up immediately and slipping himself when he tried helping Gabriel up. Gabe grinned and got up without him, heading for the cabin.

When Gabriel had to stop and open the door to the cabin Sam almost caught him but he made it into the cabin and the second floor surrounded by books and the smell of oak and Sam before he was completely trapped. Both of them were breathing heavy and smiling, “Not bad for an old man” Sam teased 

“Shut up.” Gabriel snorted

“Why don’t you make me?” Sam shot back and his mouth snapped shut, the tension now much higher than normal. Honestly, Sam knew better. Maybe that’s why he said it. No relatives would interrupt them out here. No ruined pastries. Nothing to distract them at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay over 38 chapters of this so you know they are having sex the next chapter so avert your innocent eyes


	6. Do I Wanna Know?

He had been hard since Sam kissed him at the bend in the path but that invitation was so blatant, it caught him off guard. “You sure about that, kiddo?”

Sam nodded jerkily and took a couple steps toward him, the same question in his eyes.

Gabriel breathed out slowly, his lips twitching nervously as he walked toward Sam, the man’s eyes were so many different colors Gabriel could get lost in there. He knotted his hands in the plaid shirt Sam had on before smoothing them out and linking across Sam‘s neck, pulling him down and reaching up to meet the waiting lips. His tongue swiped across Sam’s bottom lip, Sam parted his mouth and tangled their tongues together, pushing and fighting for dominance, he reached up farther, pushing against Sam’s mouth. Sam just opened his mouth wider, compliant to a point as his hands went to Gabriel’s belt, undoing it with practiced ease, Sam’s tongue rubbed against his own, softly, before Sam was sliding down Gabriel’s body and he gasped when Sam pulled his jeans down slowly, his eyes never leaving Gabriel’s. He mouthed at the heat pressing against Gabe’s boxers making Gabe’s whole body shudder, Sam’s hands slid up Gabriel’s thighs, tracing the bottom set of wings that were hugging Gabriel’s hips and reaching down to spread against his thighs. Salvia glistening around Sam’s mouth, wetting the boxers and making Gabriel ache for them to be gone. 

Sam looked up through long lashes and Gabriel’s hips shot forward when he felt one of Sam’s hand’s squeeze his ass while the other slid down the crevice in his boxers, he hit his head back against the bookcase and wiggled against Sam’s hand, pushing back against the finger circling his hole then forward into the heat of Sam‘s mouth. His toes curling as he hit his head against the bookcase again when Sam retracted only to pull his boxers down all the way, Sam went to swallow his lover but Gabriel pulled him up. Eyes closed and shook his head, “Wouldn’t last.” Sam just licked his lips and pulled him toward the bed in the middle of the room and tugging off the mud soaked shirt Gabriel was wearing before pushing him back against the soft mattress. 

He kissed him thoroughly, tongue running over every part of Gabriel’s mouth he could reach before pulling back and whispering hoarsely “Don’t need to.” in Gabriel’s ear and Gabriel whimpered, hips canting up into the air but Sam pushed them down and golden eyes shot open looking like the gaze could burn into Sam, Gabriel’s hands came up to Sam’s shirt and undid the buttons, his fingers fumbling and shaking with lust and the need to hurry. When all the buttons of his shirt were open, Gabriel leaned up and pressed an open mouth kiss to Sam’s sternum before moving toward his left nipple, biting and licking, swirling his tongue around it till it peaked, Gabe encouraged by Sam’s breathy moans. Gabriel’s hands went to his pants undoing that button as well and pulling them down slightly before pulling away altogether looking expectantly at Sam who sat up and pulled them off, falling back onto the bed next to Gabriel when he did. Both convulsing into giggles as Sam threw his pants a little to far and they landed on the couch downstairs, Gabriel took the advantage and sat on Sam’s hips, feeling the hard length under there, pulling Sam’s boxers off before crawling back up Sam and kissing him, shoving his tongue in as far as it would go and Sam moaned, grabbing the back of Gabriel’s head and doing the same to his mouth. Gabriel drew back and smirked roguishly, rocking his hips and both of them let out groans of not enough, Sam choking out “Fuck.” and Gabriel slipped down till he was eye level with Sam’s cock and looked up to the iridescent eyes.

“Not yet, baby.” he said, flicking his tongue out and swirling it around the velvety softness of Sam’s tip, licking away the small drops of precome and making Sam keen against him, large hands fisting into the golden blonde hair and Gabriel moaned, submitting when Sam pushed his head forward and took the tip into his mouth, sucking incredibly lightly.

“F-ff-fuck, pl- ….please…don’t… “ Sam whined, squirming around on the mattress and Gabriel pulled off, lips swollen and salvia dripping from them, making Sam squeeze his eyes shut and let the wet moan escape his throat “Don’t stop.” and Gabriel grinned, going back to his cock and licking a stripe down it and mouthing at Sam’s balls before coming back up to take him down to the root and twirling his tongue, his nose pressed into the tight curls of hair at the base and the flooding scent of _Sam_ filling his senses. 

Sam’s legs circled around his chest and flipped them over so Gabriel was on the bottom and Sam slithered down until he could capture Gabriel’s mouth, Gabe instantly pushing his tongue into Sam’s mouth and he groaned pulling back as he rolled his hips, watching Gabriel’s mouth fall open and his eyes fluttering as he whimpered “Sam, now.” his voice so beautifully shattered when he felt their erections rub against each other.

Sam moved down so he could continue what he started before Gabriel distracted him, pressing his lips and tongue against the vein on Gabriel’s dick, his fingers teasing around Gabriel’s scrotum before trailing back to his hole and teasing there as well. Gabriel shot up off the bed, arching and nearly screaming Sam’s name. _There_. Sensitive and raw, Sam had found a special spot and how lovely that it just happened to be there. Sam pulled off and grinned deviously. “Turn over.” he asked, his voice shaking as much as Gabriel’s hands fisted in the sheets, he opened his eyes and nodded quickly as he pressed his face into the pillows, trusting Sam.

Sam opened the nightstand drawer and got out cherry flavored lube, putting a pillow under Gabriel’s hips, Gabriel complying easily in the bliss. He opened the tube of slick and molded the plastic, making the lube gush over his hand, he rubbed at Gabriel’s hip making him pant and push his face farther into the pillow when Sam reached around and covered his leaking prick with the lubricant, the whole room now smelling of artificial cherry and sex. His wet fingers lead back to Gabriel’s hole and traced around it, making the lube drip from it by the time Sam’s fingers pulled away as Gabriel vibrated with wanton pleas.

“Shhh.” he whispered and Gabriel felt the exhale of air against hole, he grasped the sheets tighter and his body tensed, Sam frowned, his hand going back to Gabriel’s cock, stroking slowly. “Relax.” he said, kissing Gabriel’s back “It won’t hurt. I promise.” and Sam grinned against the sweaty tattooed skin when the tension eased away and he nosed at Gabe‘s hole, making his lover start with awareness of what Sam planned on doing.

The malleable heat known as Sam’s tongue swiped over his entrance, his mouth overwhelming Gabriel, making him cry out and white knuckle the sheets in desperation, forcing himself not to shove back against Sam as his tongue ran around the circle of puckered skin and Gabriel sobbed into the pillow “S-Sammy, c’mon.” but that wasn’t what Sam wanted to hear and he pushed the tip of his tongue _just_ into the ring of muscle making Gabriel choke on his words, Sam lapping at him with his tongue and he couldn’t help himself push back when a finger joined Sam’s tongue in teasing Gabriel. Sam only pulled away when he tried again. Gabriel groaned in protest. “Sam, please.”

Sam smiled in triumph before he let his tongue slide all the way past the hole, licking at silkiness there. Nipping at the rim and curling up his finger and twisting his tongue, slightly skimming over Gabriel’s sweet spot and making Gabe shudder and gasp into the pillow, Sam pulled his tongue out, leaving only his finger. He leaned against Gabriel’s back, tilting his lovers head so he could kiss him, pressing his tongue into Gabriel’s mouth and making him taste himself on Sam’s tongue, the kiss was at an awkward angle so it didn’t last long but enough to make Gabriel know what the lube tasted like. He pushed himself back, rocking on the single digit in him and grunting when Sam added another, moaning out Sam’s name, face twisted, contorted with want and mouth slack.

Pushing back as Sam scissored his fingers inside, making him loose and eager. “Ready. ’M ready.” he gasped out between choked noises. Sam removed his fingers and paused, slicking up his cock with the lube and Gabriel turned over, wrapping his legs around Sam’s waist, sitting up and catching Sam’s mouth in a debauched kiss, earning a gasp from Sam as his hand joined Sam’s in rubbing the lube up and down his prick, Gabriel lifted himself up as Sam positioned his cock and Gabriel shoved down, sobbing against Sam’s neck when he bottomed out. Sam growled at the sensation, staying his hips as best he could, giving Gabriel time to adjust to him. He grinned against Gabriel’s hair “Missionary?” and felt Gabriel shake with laughter and hit his arm. He felt so full. So utterly completely filled by Sam. He liked it. He wanted more.

“I wanted to see you.” he muttered and Sam smiled, pushing up Gabriel’s chin so he could kiss him again.

“That’s sweet.” Sam teased and Gabriel tried scowling but failed so instead he pushed down harder and Sam groaned in surprise “Shut up and fuck me, Winchester.” Gabe snarled at him but Sam didn’t move. 

“So demanding.” Sam answered, grabbing Gabriel’s glossy hips so he wouldn’t do it again and continued, shaking his head “I didn’t prep you enough. It would hurt.”

Gabriel pouted “So what? I’ll walk a little funny, I don’t care.”

“I do. This isn’t the last time, it’s the first and I want it to feel good.” Sam shot back firmly, kissing at Gabriel’s face but not his lips making Gabriel still and look at Sam. 

“Do you want to go with me?” he asked, his voice so very, very, quiet as if he was asking Sam to die for him. Perhaps he was, Michael and Lucifer were nothing if not malicious. He squeezed his eyes shut and fought the urge to move.

Sam’s resolve of not thrusting up into the tight heat was giving way rapidly. “Do you want me to?” he asked back because of course he wanted to go, he didn’t think he could last a week away from Gabriel now that he had him.

“Yes.” Gabriel answered, his eyes opened. God help him, he did. He wanted Sam to go. He wanted Sam. All of him and to give Sam all in return. But first Sam needed to see what all of Gabriel meant and he couldn’t do that without going with him. Maybe Balthazar was right. Maybe he did l-He didn’t want to think about this now, didn’t want to think about anything except the man in front of him so he pulled up and fell back down making Sam grunt in surprise and drawing out his own moan.

Sam knew it was a distraction but he was too close to care, he’d go back to it later. He finally, _finally_ , thrust up and Gabriel howled, pushing back against his cock, hands gripping Sam’s shoulders.

With the waiting and adding that with all the foreplay, it only took a couple more frenzied, well-placed, plunges before Gabriel gave into oblivion, with Sam’s large hand around his prick, Sam was filling Gabriel with his ecstasy, calling Gabriel’s name. Sam collapsing against the sheets and Gabriel on top of him.

It was so quiet in the cabin, deep breathing the only sign of life. Gabriel blinked at Sam, the hazel being mixed with blue and bright green and even touches of purple or maybe he was just that exhausted from being teased for so long. He shifted and closed his eyes, moving off of Sam and making emptiness fill the void in him now, come dribbling down his thigh. He went to move off the bed as well but Sam frowned, catching his waist that was still slippery from lube and come, he pulled him back into the bed and made their eyes meet again. Gabriel raised a questioning eyebrow but Sam looked confused as to the point as well.

“Can you…” he trailed off, his hair falling into his eyes, Gabe’s fingers tangling in it and brushing it out his face almost immediately. 

“Can I what, big guy?” he asked, giving an encouraging smirk

Sam returned a small hopeful smile “Can you stay?”

Gabriel suddenly felt sick, he wasn’t about to leave but Sam thought he had. Because that’s what usually happened. He looked back at Sam, the creases of his smile and the way his forehead wrinkled when he thought something bad was about to happen, without thinking Gabriel’s other hand went and pushed until Sam’s forehead was smooth, his fingers tracing the ridges of Sam's face, taking out the eyebrow piercing and setting on the nightstand. He looked back and found himself drowning in apprasing multicolored eyes. And all he could think was what idiot would leave this guy. He surged up and kissed him softly. “I wasn’t leaving, Sam.” 

“Oh. Okay. Good. I don’t want you to.” Sam caught himself from adding one last word because ‘ever’ didn’t seem like something you rush into. It was surprising ,though, how much he did want to say it. 

Gabriel motioned to his come slicked belly “I’d rather not have it dry.” 

Sam grinned, leaning down to lick a stripe off and Gabriel’s mouth went dry, nobody had that quick of a refractory time but if he did…

It tasted like bitter cherries and Gabriel; Sam cleaned up every last drop on Gabriel’s stomach and swiped the come from his thigh too before sending a questioning glance toward Gabe.

He shook his head, he didn’t mind it and he would feel strange being totally empty “It’s …fine.” then burrowed into Sam’s side when he laid down next to Gabriel, fingers automatically splaying on the Sam's chest, following the lines and dips of the art on his skin.


	7. Hell Above

Raindrops raced down the hotel room’s window, thunder rumbled in the not-so-far distance. It was freezing in the borrowed room; the AC had been left running by the last tenet. Muffled music from the room next door seeping through the rather thick walls, testament to the fact the volume had to be at its limit. The actual artist was unknown to him but the music was demanding his attention. The words were spoken as through water but it was clear what the music was trying to convey. Sadness. He missed his piano. His fingers started tapping in what would have been described as erratic in form but in truth it was an overture Inias had written before he gave up on his music for beloved albeit short elation of chemicals. “Pity.“ he mumbled to the walls. It was one of six pieces he had memorized.

Uriel who had accompanied him, looked at him from the window, a questioning look on his face but Gadreel shook his head. His silent younger brother looked back out into the rain. Gadreel sat at the edge of a king sized bed. He wasn’t tired. He wasn’t awake. In fact he was still in a bit of awe from the intricacy of his brothers’ newfound relationship. Gabriel and Balthazar had practically emanated trust for each other; he hadn’t realized they had grown close. But then again, he was surprised to find himself beyond the iron fence at all. It had been years since he’d even left the mountains. Hester had urged him to go, to send a warning. Michael had been adamant about him staying to keep Metatron away from the rest of the family but the bookworm had hissed at him to “get out of this rat infested horror chamber before he died” and he listened to Metatron before he would listen to Michael. This was unexplainable but fact. Lucifer on the other hand had been on rusted nails and broken glass about the whole affair.

Their screams of anger still echoed in his ears but a smile played on his lips. Raphael had been in hiding from the two of them for the better part of the last month, refusing to interact with their big brothers. That only made the epic fight amusing to him. There were other reasons but he took delight in Raphael’s fear of them. It was sadistic, he wouldn’t deny but seeing that proud bastard cower on his knees was a pleasant thing. If only there was someone that struck a similar cord in the eldest two. But that man was long gone and had taken family equality with him. It had only been Gadreel willing to talk to the unstable men. He shook his head at himself; he took unnecessary risks for the others sake. Little did they know or appreciate about his efforts. Hester was a comfort, though. And Uriel stayed close to him.

That’s the reason he had warned his brother. Hester and Uriel were quite furious with Cas but he was the baby and the need to offer some sort of protection was overwhelming between the two. Gadreel had agreed to going along for support but Uriel hadn’t left the hotel room since they got there. That’s why he had been the one to warn them. He let out a sigh; it was all done for absolutely nothing. Gabriel wouldn’t listen, it was too delicate a matter for any of them to ignore. Too dangerous a situation to bypass. A prepaid phone that he’d bought at the airport was vibrating on the T.V. stand and he wondered how long it would ring if he didn’t touch it. 

An hour had gone by and the phone would stop momentarily before another call came through and its resonation would come back.

It was one of two siblings, Michael or Raphael, perhaps if Metatron had figured out his password to the security room it was him but Gadreel doubted that very much. Neither were ideal conversationalists and he continued ignoring the phone, laying back on the bed and watching the fan spin in endless cycles. Right about now, the private plane would be landing in the private airport and Virgil and Zachariah and Raphael would get into a private car that would drive them to Lawrence and they would make threats to their brothers. Privacy, while delicate bliss if it actually meant solitude, was quite disgusting at times. Gadreel and Uriel had flown here middle class from a quite normal airport in Austria and caught a cab. Hester would laugh and ask if his cabbie was rude. Metatron would blink before going back to his latest book. Michael would sneer. He was unsure why he was imagining their reactions but it was bringing sleep on swift so he went on with his musings. Inias would twitch and ask if the plane ride was rough. Lucifer would grin at him and ask if he had many conquests. He didn’t much care what Zachariah or the rest would say, it was sure to be demeaning and rude and he couldn’t care less. 

His speculations were interrupted by a knock on the door and his gaze landed on it for several moments before moving sluggishly to open it. Uriel made no attempt to move but his hand went to the .38 he carried. Gadreel held up his hand and opened the door. When he did, a very stern looking Virgil stood blinking at him. He didn’t move so the man could enter the dim room but didn’t close the door either, he just stared blandly. 

“Where are they?” his brother’s gruff voice croaked with jet lag and Gadreel remained silent. Just when Virgil opened his mouth to speak again, he cut him off.

“Sleeping.” he quipped and saw no change in the determination. He scowled “I know you’re their mindless jockey but you’re not going to be rude. Bother them in the morning.” then he shut the door and laid back down on the bed, eyes tracking the rotation of blades on the fan. Virgil wasn’t mindless, in fact the man had a PhD but he followed orders blindly and stupidly so Gadreel would treat him as such. He shifted so only his hoodie remained while his other coat fell to the floor. 

He glanced at the clock above the T.V., the block numbers reading 2:16. He fumbled with the hoodie for a moment before that joined the coat on the floor, a wife-beater let him actually realize how cold the room had gotten but he didn’t mind, it felt like the castle. Uriel’s hand moved off his gun. He picked up the T.V. controller from the nightstand and turned it on, sitting down on the other bed across from Gadreel.

Gadreel didn’t recognize the show but that wasn’t surprising he barely watched T.V. at home. Unless the security feeds counted, that is. There was another knock and he glared at the door, it was just too much like he was some kind chaperon for them because they don’t know what to do outside the fence. His phone beeped in response to a text and he switched his scowl to the other offending object. Yet the phone beeped again and the knocking wouldn’t cease along with the loud melancholy music in the background.   
Gadreel longed for his piano.


	8. Broken Cups and Unloaded Pistols

Cas had left with Dean, Gabriel had left with Sam and Balthazar sat in the empty café. Garth and Kevin had hung up their aprons and the customers had left, he checked the time on his phone. He had two hours to kill before he had to head into work, which meant cleaning up the bar. He and Crowley had got into it the other day so he was on janitor duty. He didn’t mind.

His mind drifted to the way Gabriel had flinched when he put a hand on his shoulder, it didn’t make much sense. Just when he was about the poke at the semantics of the earlier situation, a shadow loomed outside the door and Bal stood up as fast as he could, knocking the mug of cold coffee to the floor and shattering it. They were a day early and it couldn’t be for any good reason. Michael knew they had agreed to go and still sent his lackeys. 

Raphael’s silhouette glared at him from the rain drenched street and he backed up, his arm crawling with the need to scratch at it. He swallowed and fumbled for his phone, his contacts glowed at him, lighting up the dark café, he pressed Gabriel’s name and the phone dialed the number. 

It went to voicemail.

He groaned, mumbling profanities nervously and scrolled down to Cas’ number though he doubted his little brother could do much. He could still warn him. The phone ringed against his ear and he turned to go out the back door but he ran into a rather stiff mass that knocked him down on his ass, phone clattering a few feet away.

Zachariah’s balding head gleamed with LCD light of his phone and he forced the panic down, his little brother’s gravelly voice came through the speaker “Yes?”

Bal made a grab for the phone before his brother could stop him “Call Gabriel.” and he hit end, dropping the phone as hands seized his jacket, the leather squeaking in protest and his brother hauled him to his feet. 

“That doesn’t matter. We’ll find them, anyway.” his brother sneered; Balthazar pushed till he was free and smiled.

“Of course, you will, darling. We’re coming quietly.” his voice clearly pushing that if they weren’t willing, Michael’s lackeys would never find them. Zachariah took a step toward him but a commanding voice stopped him. 

Balthazar did everything in his power not to flinch, not to tense in fear. Fear. Gabriel had been afraid? Of him? Maybe not him but Gabriel didn’t scare easily. Yet he’d felt the man’s muscles tighten, felt the threads being stretched much too taunt. His fingers curled and he took another step back when Raphael entered his line of sight, sulking into the shadowed part of the shop.

“Still hiding in the dark, Balthazar? Still afraid of your betters?” Raphael asked, it was full of contempt and Zachariah smirked cruelly

“Well, if you’re my betters, I’d loathe to see my worse.” Balthazar shot back, his voice coming off playful and he questioned how he’d done that when his knees wobbled in protest of standing. He leaned down and grabbed his phone, shoving it in his pocket.

“Last I heard you were living with them.” Zachariah spat and a harsh laugh escaped Raphael’s mouth.

“Still, better than living in the Dungeon of Harrow, though, wouldn’t you say?” he snapped, making a wide circle around them, trying to get to the back door and the motorcycle waiting in the alley, he had borrowed off of Sam’s friend, Ruby. 

Raphael glowered at him “That is your home; you should treat it with respect.”

“No, sweetheart, I’m afraid you’re mistaken. My home is warm, smells like Pepsi, mint and a touch of weed. There are clothes everywhere and the first season of _Lost_ plays on repeat. There is a puppy by the ridiculous name of Kansas whining for me right now. See ya tomorrow, love.” and with that he took the chance, a mad dash out the back and straddling the mechanical equivalent of alcoholic high. Fitting the helmet on, he turned the keys and took off down the alley just as Raphael and Zachariah entered it.

After he was two streets away, he slowed some and took the phone out of his pocket, dialing Cas. The answer was immediate. “What happened? Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, Cassie. Listen, they’re a day early and I don’t know if they know where the house is or not but just lock the doors in case. Tell your boyfriend to get his ass downstairs and open my safe-give him the code- , there’s a 9 millimeter under the papers to the house. He needs to load it and be careful; it’ll jam on the second shot. If Gabriel moved it again, there’s a closet in his room, it should be in there. If that’s locked, which it shouldn’t be but if it is, there’s a pair of .45s under the pool table. You don’t open that goddamn door, Cas. Not for anyone. Where’s Gabriel? Did you get a hold of him?”

“Well, no. Sam’s not answering either but I think they went out of town. Dean said something about a cabin. Balthazar?” his brother’s voice wavered

“Yeah, Cas?” he asked turning and glancing behind him.

“Why do you have so many weapons in the house?” 

He let out a stressed laugh and shook his head “Precautions. In my defense, the .45s are Gabe's.”

“Precautions? Who would we-Why do I need protection?” and Balthazar heard a noise of disbelief in the background from Dean and he smiled in a half relieved way. 

“Look, just do what I asked, okay? I‘ll explain later. Tomorrow.” he waited for a little bit as Cas argued with Dean before his little brother sighed, frustrated.

“Okay. Where are you?” 

“I’m going to head to Crowley’s.”

“You’re going to get drunk?” Cas asked, obviously annoyed at that thought.

“No, Cas, I’m going to work.” he said rolling his eyes and ending the call. So what if he was an hour and a half early. Crowley would be glad for the enthusiasm no matter how veiled it was and the shot gun underneath the bar would give Balthazar some much needed peace of mind.


	9. Aren't You A Brave Man?

Initially, it had been his phone that woke Gabriel up but when the fog cleared from his mind, he found himself slightly cold. He had fallen asleep pressed into Sam so he should be stifled with body heat. He blinked blearily and moved closer to Sam and felt the body next to him shudder every few minutes and beads of sweat were slipping into Sam’s closed eyes. He frowned at his lover; this was Sam’s idea of not that bad?

He nudged the larger man a few times but each time only resulted in whimpers and Sam’s eyes moving disconnectedly behind eyelids. His worry was growing “Sam.” he tried but nothing changed, he didn’t want to make the dream worse than it already was. Not sure of what else to do, he curled up around the huge excuse of a man, tangling their legs together and pulling Sam’s dead weight onto his shoulder. He brushed the sweat-slicked hair from his face, whispering in his ear about the cabin and the quiet and the lake outside and how unsure he was of them, of what was happening. He murmured everything and anything into Sam’s ear, about how he was worried Sam would get hurt when they go to the castle and about how dazzling Sam’s smile was. 

“You shouldn‘t come with me.” 

“You can hear the wind outside, Sam. Listen, c’mon, Sam.” 

“Sam, it’s just a dream. That’s all. You’re fine.”

“What are you doing to me, kiddo? The way I just _gotta_ to watch you when you’re in a room, your ridiculous smile. Your dimples. See? I sound like a 50 cent romance novel. And clutching you like a security blanket while I do.”

“Hey, hey, calm down. Shhh. It’s a dream. Just a dream.”

“So much for movies and popcorn, huh? Although I like what we did a whole lot better. C‘mon, Sam, this is the part where you hit my arm and frown disapprovingly.”

“Sammy, I think ….I think I……I l-love you….” he uttered, his voice cracking but the only response was a jagged intake of breath so Gabriel went on with random descriptions and thoughts. 

Soon the shudders died away and Sam shifted so he was clinging to Gabe, the Novak smiled weakly, letting his hand continue running through Sam’s hair but his mind was pushing at him, muttering how he was a fool. How he’d only get Sam hurt. Sam shifted again and exhausted eyes fluttered open into the darkness of the cabin. “Gabe? Oh, thank god.” his lover rushed out, he felt limbs tighten around him and lips press against his shoulder.

His hand paused mid brush and he watched as worry and grief?- drifted out of Sam’s eyes. “Sam? Kiddo? Hey, you okay?”

“I thought you….I saw you d-…nothing.” Sam mumbled against his skin.

Gabriel said nothing letting Sam stay wrapped around him, his breathing was uneven and literally- Gabe counted- every 16 seconds Sam would squeeze tighter as if he was making sure Gabe was still there. He seemed so small, so fragile and worried. After twenty minutes of this and still Sam kept on, Gabriel breathed out his name “Sam.”

He stopped and Gabriel watched as Sam’s hands found each other and one started rubbing the scarred palm. Gabriel gently took a hold of the one rubbing at the scar and made Sam’s eyes meet his. “Sam.”

“Sorry.”

And Gabriel cringed; he was really starting to hate that word. He mused that Sam would be pacing if he was upright. “Don’t apologize to me. I don’t like it.”

Sam nodded against him and the grounding squeezes picked back up; Gabriel dragged him closer until Sam was all but lying on top of him. “Sam.” he repeated for the third time and again the pressure stopped.

“I have to do something, Gabriel.” Sam pleaded into the dark, as if all of this was necessary, as if it was the most important thing he could do and Gabriel ached at the sound of his voice. “I _have_ to. You were just-gone. And I couldn‘t do anything, I couldn‘t stop it.”

The quote was wrong, Gabriel thought, looking at Sam, feeling the worry in the tense body. It wasn’t fear that was a motivator, it was the helplessness fear shoved on you. The incapableness of stopping danger or hurt. Being afraid _made_ you feel useless and weak. And people did everything in their power to fight that. 

“Sam, look at me.” he said gently and tired kaleidoscopic eyes glanced at him in the dark. “I’m fine. No, hey, look. Completely fine. No bumps or bruised, not a one. All limbs, present and accounted for.” he teased but his eyes tried conveying his statement. He did again anyway “Really, Sam. I’m fine. It was just a nightmare. It’s over now.”

Still Sam was stiff, unrelenting in his grip. Gabriel snuck back into silence for another moment or two, letting Sam take what he needed. When he spoke again he tried luring Sam into a different conversation “Is there any reason you have a part of the Divine Comedy tattooed on your thigh and the Virgin Mary on your side?”

And he felt a swell of relief as tension trickled out of Sam “I liked it. And the virgin was for my mom. She was a bit religious, I suppose. Her name was Mary, too.”

He got captured by strong arms and suddenly his back was pressed against Sam’s chest, Sam’s voice in his ear. He smiled, titling back his head so he could see Sam. “What happened to her?”

Sam’s arm sneaked around his waist and tugged him closer “She died. When I was little. In a fire.”

“I’m sorry.” he offered but felt Sam shrug.

“I don’t really remember her.”

“And why has Dante proved himself worthy of your skin?” Gabriel asked, hand reached down and tracing the writing already on Sam’s thigh.

“You’d have to ask him.” Sam said, teasingly.

Without really thinking about it Gabriel started mumbling what passages he knew from the twisted fate of Dante and his Beloved “ _But when a mountain’s foot I reach’d, where closed the valley that had pierced my heart with dread, I look’d aloft, and saw his shoulders broad already vested with that planet’s beam, Who leads all wanderers safe through every way._ ”

Sam smiled down at him “I thought you went to med school.”

“I did. I lived with roommate who was taking the literature course at different college; she had to memorize the first four paragraphs. Not to mention one of my brother’s is named Virgil. Not as nice as Dante’s, though. You don‘t have a whole Canto on there, do you?”

His lover shook his head “Only the last two paragraphs of XX.”

“Sam.” he muttered, the hand coming up and twisting in Sam’s hair, he turned so he was facing the Winchester. He searched -now- hazel eyes and remembered what he had said earlier when Sam was still asleep, it wasn’t fair to Sam that he’d said it then, he knew that. “I….I’m uh…I’m glad I met you.”

Sam gave a blinding smile “Me too.” he mumbled against Gabriel’s lips. 

Gabriel felt like a jerk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know guys........you want me to keep going?


	10. Chaotically Neutral

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah six comments and im back. Im such a pushover. SO we're pushing on! The chapters maybe be a little longer in uploading....

After a couple more reassurances that Gabriel was, in fact, alive and well, Sam would drift in and out of sleep. Right now, he was dozing next to Gabriel, hogging all of the already thin sheets. Gabe was freezing, despite the body heat, he was still shivering. He tried to just deal with the cold but the more it seeped into him, the more he could remember his room at the castle with much too avid of detail. Scowling into the room, the sun just barely settling on Sam’s earlier discarded shirt and Gabriel’s sleep drunk mind produced an idea. He slipped away from Sam’s embrace and got up from the bed. He hissed slightly as the cold wooden floor greeted his feet, before padding over to the crumpled shirt, debating how cold he really was. He glanced back to the bed and noticed Sam pawing at the impression in the bed where Gabriel had been. Gabe grabbed the shirt and pulled it on, the chill dimming immediately. He sighed then walked back over to the bed, crawling back on it till he was under Sam’s arm again.

He always had trouble going back to sleep, especially after he’d been woken up once so he lay there for quite awhile before something brought Sam back to the awake world. 

He watched as multicolored eyes squeezed shut before opening groggily. Sam smiled at him from across the pillow. “Hey.”

“Hey yourself.”

Sam squinted at him “Did you sleep at all since before?”

He made a noncommittal noise in response and let his fingers brush the chocolate hair out of dazzling greenish eyes, his fingers sliding down and tracing Sam’s jaw line, Sam subtly pushing into them before he pulled back his hand, giving his lips a tight stretch.

Sam frowned at him “I don’t like that smile. It looks painted on.”

Gabriel quirked an eyebrow at him and let the fake smile fall away. Sam’s frown disappeared with it.

“You know this is kind of a first for me.” Sam said, his gaze shooting away and the slightest bit of pink touching his cheeks.

“What is?” he asked, his hand going back over to Sam, his chest this time. The golden eagle under his fingertips. Sam looked back at him, a bit of hope daring in the scrutiny he was sending Gabriel.

“Waking up next to someone.”

It was Gabriel’s turn to frown “But I thought-”

“Brady never stayed.” Sam cut him off and Gabriel blinked.

“Brady?”

Sam closed his eyes and swallowed. “My …other.”

“Oh.” Gabriel answered, stupidly and nodded. He licked his lips and moved closer to Sam, their noses almost touching.

“Kali.” He gave back.

Sam’s eyes shot open with confusion, his eyebrows bending down “Kali?” he parroted much like Gabe had and Gabe smiled a bit before it was dragged away with memories.

Gabriel bit at the inside of his cheek “She was uh…not as ….invested as I was.”

Clarity wrote onto Sam’s features and Gabriel felt a hand cup his chin and a thumb trace his bottom lip. Gabe looked everywhere but Sam’s eyes, finally settling on the tattoo on Sam’s arm “Ghostbusters?”

Sam laughed softly “Dean. Adam has one too. It was Dean’s idea.”

“But there’s another one. Another member.” Gabriel said, his fingers abandoning the eagle for the symbol.

Sam nodded, a bit of sadness pooling in the set of his mouth “John. We were going get him to do it. But then Adam met Manny and Brazil….” the nodding switching to shaking negatively “He’d rather pretend he didn’t have sons at all, let alone get matching tattoos.”

Gabriel pressed a quick kiss to his lips. “Still. Yours is better then my reason.”

Sam was frowning the whole explanation that Gabe proffered. When he finished, Sam hesitated then said “That’s…a bit sadistic.”

Gabriel scoffed “Yeah, well, that’s a great word for Michael and Luci.”

“It’s a shame, they’re beautiful.” Sam said, studying the wings and their design, he caught Gabriel staring at him and smiled softly “You’re beautiful.” he let out a delighted peel of laughter when Gabriel’s cheeks turned red and pushed his face into the pillow. “You’re cute when you blush, too.”

Gabriel pushed his face further into the soft fabric and groaned out “Stop it.”

Sam laughed and moved closer, skimming Gabe’s stomach and ribs with his fingertips, making the Novak squirm at the ticklish feeling. Sam smiled and dug his fingers in a little deeper “But it’s true, Gabe.” he murmured, innocently.

Gabriel batted his hands away and when he turned his head to look at his lover, Sam was now looming on top of him, stabilizing himself by the hands pushing into the bed on either side of Gabriel. He raised his eyebrows and was worrying at his bottom lip. Sam pressed his forehead against Gabe’s and kissed him, catching the agitated lip and sucking lightly. Pulling away and taking the lip with him before releasing it and giving a contented smile. Gabriel had butterflies. Butterflies, for fuck sakes! 

_Do it now. Tell him. Tell him._

He ignored his mind “Hey, come on, I’ll make you breakfast.” Gabriel said, getting out of the bed and watched as Sam’s eyes widen, trailing up and down his body. The much too big shirt ,he belatedly realized, he still had on was half off of his right shoulder causing the hungry spark in Sam‘s eyes. Sam’s tongue flicked out and wet his chapped lips. He grinned. Well then.

“See something you like?” he asked, throwing back his greeting from that day about a week ago when he’d run into Sam for the first time. It seemed like years, though. Like he’d known Sam forever. He’d certainly like to. Whoa, where the hell did that come from?

He shook his head and pulled at the sheets “C’mon, lazy bones, get up.”

Sam was torn out of his revere and yawned before looking to his watch “It’s only 6 something, Gabe.”

Gabriel swallowed before looking away, choosing to glare at the couch on the floor below “I need to talk to you. About the trip. There’s things about that place….things you need to know.”


	11. I Think You Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed my user name babes it was Werther but that was a bit depressing so now its attilas_cupcakes.

After he had said the mysterious words Sam watched as Gabriel moved away from the bed to root through his discarded pants, pulling out a phone. While Gabriel dialed his voicemail, Sam wondered what he meant by ‘things’, he sighed heavily and went to move out of the bed before he realized he was still naked. 

Really, there was no point in being self conscious but ... “Gabe.”

Honey eyes flickered in annoyance and a finger was pushed against lips as Gabriel listened to the prerecorded message. He huffed and sat up, scanning the room for his boxers, spotting them a little bit away from the foot of the bed, he scooted down till he was lying on his belly, swiping his hand futilely at the underwear just out of his reach.

Gabriel now finished with the voicemail and bit shaken was amused and calmed when he noticed Sam and offered only a snort and quick slap on Sam’s ass before running down the stairs, to presumably start breakfast.

Sam jolted against the bed and watched, surprised, as Gabe took off. He grinned and grabbed his boxers, pulling them on and fell off the bed from trying to twist his body so awkwardly. Hey, at least he got his boxers on. 

He glanced around the room again from his new outlook and took in the clothes thrown haphazardly about, a few books had fallen from their positions on the old shelves from last night’s activities, even the flavored lube was by the stairs, the room still smelled faintly of cherries but mostly the permeated scent was books, old paper and ink. And yet one more scent that was absolutely intoxicating to Sam. It smelled like Gabriel.

“I’m hopeless.” Sam mumbled from his spot on the floor, leaning back against the bed. 

“You say something?” Gabriel called from downstairs and Sam ducked his head, forgetting that the cabin basically echoed every sound. 

“Nah, just talking to myself.” he answered, raising his voice a bit as he got up from the floor and went over the ruffled books. As he set them back in their place he could hear the sound of coffee percolating and the sizzling of something in a frying pan. He yawned again and his stomach gave a persistent growl. He walked down the stairs, leaning against the kitchen doorway and smiled at the scene of Gabriel, his back to Sam, in Sam’s shirt that stopped about mid thigh and was still half off of Gabe’s shoulder, showing the golden detailed wings. Gabe was messing around with what was most likely pancake batter at the stovetop. He was humming a familiar song-was it? It was. “Almost Paradise” was coming in soft little waves of vibration through Gabriel’s throat and Sam’s stomach clenched, warm and tight. The knot that had been building for the last week bursting in his chest and making him choke as more warmth spread through his body. 

_Oh._

Domesticity was never something he wanted. Something he thought of, sure, who hasn’t, except actually settling down with someone was just a dream. That it was simply impossible. And Sam was sure Brady had proved that it was but he here stood. In a cabin with all his favorite books and all his favorite movies, a comfy couch, sunlight streaming through the trees and the open door- which Gabriel must have done-, filtered only by a screen door where it landed on the shag carpet playing with the shadows and Gabriel (half-naked, his mind supplied) humming in the kitchen. A job doing something he loved with a friend he loved. With his brother happy, sober, and off somewhere with his own partner. Add the ball of fluff named Jovi he’d gotten the day he’d met his lover and that was his definition of home. That was it. 

_Oh._

_Oh, fuck_.

“Sam?” Gabe asked looking over his shoulder and Sam smiled and walked into the kitchen, sitting down at the small table. Gabriel gave him a funny look before going back to the stove and flipping the second pancake onto a plate. He put it in front of Sam and set another plate down at an empty chair, getting syrup from a pantry, setting that down as well then retrieved whip cream and strawberries from the fridge. He sat down and bit his lip again before rising and grabbing the coffee and two mugs, finally sitting down for sure and sending Sam a grin.

“What’s all this for?” Sam asked, snagging the strawberries and cutting them before he realized they were blueberry pancakes, he just shook his head and added the extra fruit anyway.

Gabriel didn’t answer right away, too focused on drowning his pancakes in maple syrup, whip cream and strawberries.

Sam shook his head “Cas is gunna yell at me for letting you eat that.” he said around a fork full of pancakes that tasted simply amazing

“Screw Cas.” Gabriel said, popping a strawberry into his mouth “I just wanted us to have at least one normal morning before I drag you off to the freakin’ mountains.”

His curiosity got the better of him “Gabe, what did you mean? By ’things’?”

Gabriel paused, swallowing down the food in his mouth, shooting a helpless gaze at him before it was replaced by walls that Sam had never seen before. Well….besides the gaze in the mirror but he shoved that away, watching Gabriel.

“Uh…Lots of stuff.” he said, brushing it off and ignoring the course the conversation was trying to go.

“Gabriel.” he said, setting his fork down.

His lover sighed and reached for the coffee “Look, it was nothing. It is nothing. Just…be careful, okay? They’re ….eccentric.” 

He could tell Gabriel was sugar coating it, heavily by the sudden brick walls in butterscotch eyes but he would drop it. “That’s sounds like you’re putting it mildly.”

Or, you know, he would push the subject in _that_ tone of voice because he was an idiot.

The coffee pot was put down a bit more forcefully than necessary “Can we just drop this?”

“You’re the one who brought it up.” Sam shot back. Really, it was because he’d been living with Dean for so long he’d forgotten that sometimes you didn’t push back, to just let them tell you when they wanted to, when they were ready. He mentally kicked himself.

“Well, now, I’m asking to drop it, okay?” Gabriel said.

He sighed and nodded “I’m…. I just want to know what I’m going to be dealing with.”

Gabe’s expression softened and he looked away, the fight that had been scratching in his eyes dying away. “You don’t have to come, Sam.”

He had to stop himself from immediately refusing that notion. 

Something was obviously bothering Gabriel about this whole affair and while last night had been wonderfully dream-like, this morning was scraping away that layer and displaying the palpable worry Gabriel had about going back to this castle he had grown up in. 

“If you don’t want me to, I won’t.” he said, he wasn’t going to be the one to act on this. This was solely Gabriel’s decision. 

Gabriel opened his mouth to argue but Sam raised an eyebrow and it snapped back shut.

“Yeah, I do.” he finally answered and went back to eating his pancakes. Sam allowed a small smile as he grabbed the coffee and poured himself a cup. The sound of a motorcycle pulling up outside made both of them look up.


	12. Moring After.... Or Does It Qualify As Before?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short I know I'm sorry. The next update should be soon and more than one chapters :P

Gabriel watched Balthazar appear outside the screen door to the cabin, a Harley Davidson motorcycle behind him with a helmet hanging off the handle bars. His brother had skipped the vacant lot all together and just drove up the path, his jeans and boots splattered with mud that the tires had kicked up. Bal gave Gabriel a questioning glance and Gabe shrugged. His brother entered the cabin and Gabriel was tempted to point out his younger brother obviously had a thing for leather but Bal‘s expression made him think twice. Gabe glanced at Sam; he looked a bit embarrassed to be caught off guard in his boxers but other than that just a little curious. Speaking of off guard, Gabe glanced down at his own apparel, or rather lack of, and grinned sheepishly at Balthazar as he came to stand in the doorway, Gabriel buttoning up Sam’s shirt quickly. “Hey, throw me those. I got your message, any particular reason you cussed into my voicemail? ” he pointed to his boxers on top of Sam’s jeans on the couch. Balthazar sighed and begrudgingly did as his older brother asked. Gabriel just shimmied into his boxers from a sitting position then moved into the chair next to Sam. 

Balthazar had the grace to look awkwardly at the floor (Sam just smirked) while he did that but when he sat back down urgency took precedent on Bal's face “While I’m sure you’re both still enveloped in the throes of love, we got a problem. A problem that decided to arrive a day earlier.”

Sam had been watching Gabriel and caught the mug that slipped from the suddenly trembling grip. He set it down and linked his other hand with Gabriel’s free hand under the table and giving it a reassuring squeeze.

Gabriel nodded, the gentle smile grounding him more than seemed possible. “Alright. Did you tell Cas?”

Balthazar nodded “Told him to tell Dean about the 9 mil and the .45‘s, too. Your brother knows how to handle a gun, right?” he asked Sam.

Sam nodded “Yeah. Will he need to? Use it, I mean.”

“I don’t think so. I think they are just trying to scare us.” Bal said, eyes pointedly glancing away from Gabe.

Gabriel noticed quicker than he wanted to as the last peaceful moments of the previous night tiptoed away. He frowned and swallowed the sigh “What happened, Bal?”

The man grinned nervously and peeled off black leather gloves and ran a hand through his hair, making some flecks of mud fall and tangling the unruly hair so it spiked even more than it already was. “Nothing too bad. I don’t think they’ll do much to the shop. Heh, they probably just left it how it was.” he said through his grin, teeth clenched in a permanent smile.

Gabriel shook his head “That stuff can be replaced. Did they come near you? Threaten you?”

The grin fell away and he pursed his lips, face still twisted into unreadable tension “No.”

Sam stifled a scoff and Bal glared at the Winchester so Sam cleared his throat and offered him an out “How’d you know where this place was?”

Gabriel gripped Sam’s hand tight enough to hurt and sent him a warning look before dropping the hand completely and Sam shrugged helplessly. Gabriel breathed out through his nose and let his hand fall on Sam’s knee. Bal sighed, his posture relaxing and Sam kicked out the nearest chair to him, Bal sank down across from them “I called to ask Dean after I got off work. I didn’t really feel like heading into a danger zone just yet and you weren’t answering your phone so Cas had me head out here to see if this is where you went.”

Gabriel took his cup back from the place on the table Sam had set it and paused before taking a drink “Danger zone?”

Balthazar cleared his throat and even Sam made a face “I bet I can guess.” the Winchester mumbled.

Bal snorted “Not pleasant, is it?”

“Never want to hear it again.” Sam agreed, taking a bite of his breakfast.

Gabriel looked up from his half eaten food “Am I missing something?”

Balthazar closed his eyes and shuddered “Cassie is very….enthusiastic.”

“Well, I mean, a lot of people are loud.” Gabriel muttered but Bal shook his head. 

“No, Gabe, that’s not what he means, he’s with Dean. Your house? Sterilize everything. And I mean everything.” Sam stated around blueberry pancakes as he added just a tiny drizzle of syrup 

Bal nodded “My sheets are being washed twice and I’m buying a new bed.”

“C’mon! They have a whole floor to themselves and you’re saying they had to do …. _that_ in ours?” he whined ignoring Bal‘s glare. 

Sam grinned, sending Gabe a mischievous grin “Chances are we’ll do ‘ _that_ ’ in yours.” 

Bal closed his eyes “I’ve been scarred enough for one day, thank you very much.”

Gabriel shoot Sam a look, he was having none of that. At least not right now. “Yeah but I wouldn’t-” but a pointed look from both of them made him reconsider “Okay, fine but not on purpose.” he pointed at Bal and got an eye roll that looked like it hurt.

Balthazar stood up “You should pack before coming to the house.” he said to Sam “The drama will end only when we’re all at the airport so I doubt you‘ll have time later.”

Sam smiled and raised an eyebrow “Why do you think I’m coming?”

The bartender scoffed lightly, putting the gloves back on and zipping up the jacket, stopping by the door to look back at Sam “Please. He made you breakfast. You’re coming.”


	13. A Tux Is Simply Essential

After Balthazar had left they had gotten dressed completely, Gabriel still a bit disappointed they didn’t have time for a repeat of last night’s events and the ride had been quiet as the reality that they would waking up in the Alps tomorrow morning set in. The conversation stayed on loopholes that could help them exploit the will.

Sam pulled into a parking lot next to his apartment building and took his keys out of the ignition and he paused looking at Gabe, the apartment was a virtual mess but he didn’t really want to leave Gabriel alone at the moment, the glances and vibes of nervousness and small doses of fear were clues that Gabriel clearly wasn’t as okay with this trip as he tried to project “I uh…Do you want to come up with me?”

Gabriel smiled, it looked tight and fake and when Gabriel noticed Sam’s frown and furrowed eyebrows it disappeared like before and Gabriel offered an apologetic look “Yeah, sure.” he answered getting out as Sam did. 

The walk to the actual building was only about twenty feet but Gabriel was deliberately keeping himself from gliding over into Sam’s personal space on sheer anxiety-induced instinct but when Sam moved into his own personal space, by choice, his body and mind relaxed, soothed by the presence. It all but vanished when Sam looped a long arm around his shoulders and pulled him into the warmth of body heat and the smell of oak. He sighed and earned a worried look from Sam. “You’re absolutely sure you have to go, Gabriel?” Sam asked, stopping.

Gabriel sighed again, tiny pins prickling his lungs with protest of his next answer “Yeah, kiddo. Trust me, if this wasn’t positively necessary, I would be dragging you back to the cabin and ravishing you.” and he winked but even he knew it probably came off as tired. Really, he should have at least attempted going back to sleep. “Don’t worry.”

Sam shook his head and they started walking again “Maybe when I’m dead, Gabriel, but until then I’m afraid you’re stuck with my worrying.” he answered as he opened the glass door for Gabriel.

And it wasn’t a confirmation; per se. Gabe didn’t know what it was. But it made him warm and fuzzy and the appeal of dragging his lover back to the cabin seemed to increase 70 fold and he should be able to control himself, dammit. But, he just _couldn’t_. Stuck with Sam. Oh, how would he ever cope? He considered dragging the giant moose of a man down for a kiss but then that would obviously point out what Sam had said and what if it was a just a mistake? A dumb accident that Sam didn’t even mean. He took a deep breath and walked into the cool air conditioned atmosphere of the apartment building. 

Sam bypassed the elevator and Gabriel followed him up three flights of stairs, before they got to Sam’s hallway. The corridor was a bit long for only four doors but Gabriel didn’t question it and the smell reminded the Novak of a hotel in ways that seemed so drastic to the comfortable vanilla and woody and (now) cherry smell that the cabin had. He frowned to himself, why was he comparing everything to the cabin? He’d only been there twice. It wasn’t even where he lived! But…..he had felt safe there. Still shaky to a degree but the small chalet offered more stability than his own house. Which was utterly stupid. During his musings Sam and Ellen had struck up a conversation about keeping Jovi for the week and Ellen agreed with the condition that Sam told her to behave before he left her with the part time Deputy and they wouldn’t have a problem. 

“Gabe?” Sam questioned, and Gabriel turned to look at him, Ellen had retreated back into her apartment and Sam and Gabriel were alone in the hallway once again and Sam’s lips were upturned in a soft smile “Get lost in your thoughts?”

He didn’t even have to force the smile he gave Sam in return “You could say that.” he answered as they walked to Sam’s door, Sam slide the key into the slot and twisted it and the handle at the same time and pushed open the door. Kevin had dropped off Jovi two hours ago, which admittedly had been a bad idea but Sam had reassured that Jovi would be fine on her own. Except now there were spare fluffy feathers everywhere and growls and yips coming from his room. He groaned and hit his head against the door. Gabriel smirked at him and he sent him a glare before he scowled and yelled “Jovi!”

The yips cut off immediately and a guilty white ball of snow all but crawled down the stairs and staying at the base of them, normally perked ears dropped and blue eyes looking up at him and Sam suddenly felt like he’d, well, kicked her. From the amount of pillow feathers it had been only one cushion but still. He walked over to her and kneeled down, still frowning but she ignored it and sat up before stretching up and putting her tiny paws on his thighs so she could barely reach his face and tried licking at his nose.

Gabriel fought the urge to sympathize with a dog but jeez, who wouldn’t want that kid’s forgiveness. Or his face. Goddammit, that was control? 

Sam frowned and put her paws on the floor and she whined her ears still flopped down. Sam knew exactly how that face worked, he had perfected it over the years on Dean and Ruby when he wanted something. And, hell, if it wasn’t working on him now. “No.” he growled out firmly, picking up the nearby shredded couch cushion and glaring at the offender. She yipped defiantly and he shook his head and repeated “No.” 

The puppy ducked her head to the ground and whined again and inched toward him till she was pressed up against his legs, he sighed heavily and picked her up. She immediately wriggled until she could get at his face and lap at his nose, happy that she redeemed herself. “Yeah, yeah, you’re forgiven. But no more pillows. Gotta get you some chew toys when I get back, should warn Ellen, too.” he mumbled to the white husky, putting her down and motioning to Gabriel to follow him upstairs.

Jovi followed them into Sam’s room sniffing furiously at Gabriel when he sat down on Sam’s bed as the Winchester opened a closet and got a suitcase off the top shelf, setting it on his bed as Jovi decided that Gabriel was obviously her other owner and crawled into his lap, licking at his face and nibbling on his fingers before curling up into a ball and settling against the Novak’s stomach. Sam just smiled at Gabriel’s surprised look and it grew into a wide grin when Gabriel’s fingers carded through Jovi’s fur, the wiggling ball pushing against Gabriel. Gabriel noticed Sam’s gaze and shot back a grin “Seems like everyone around here is cuddle-deprived. A damn shame.” 

Sam said nothing, turning back to his closet and getting jeans and shirts before looking back to Gabe “Anything specific or…?”

Gabriel scoffed “A tux. Trust me; they’ll be some kind of party before we leave. Just because Michael enjoys putting his introverted siblings into a giant gathering of people they absolutely do not know. And all of them are either homophobic,” Gabriel started using his spare hand to count down “Assholes, religious figures, power hungry titans, some distant form of royalty-”

“Alright, I got it. A tux.” Sam cut him off before he could go any farther and he was shaking his head “How did you survive those?”

Gabriel didn’t bothering looking up from the now snoring Jovi “Copious amounts of alcohol. And my little sisters.”

Sam threw another shirt into the case “Plural?”

Gabe looked up this time and grinned “Yup. Although Hester was never as nice as Anna.”


	14. And They're Off

Dean was already packed, had been since Cas agreed with him coming along, his bags by the door right now. He was currently lying in bed (fully clothed on the insistence of Cas that his brothers were due home any minute) with his boyfriend, an arm pillowing his head with a 9 millimeter fitting easily into his grip while the other arm was wrapped around Cas’ waist.

“My brothers are extremely tense.” Cas stated, it coming out a bit muffled by Dean’s chest, the voice vibrating into his sternum, he glanced down at Cas and raised an eyebrow.

“Well, yeah, I’d say so.” he said, waving the gun a little and Cas frowned.

“I don’t like firearms. And I don’t like that there was some present in our house without my knowledge.” his voice betraying how much it did and Dean shrugged.

“I can’t speak for Gabriel. But, I know Bal a little bit and he’s an asshole, yeah, but if he’s worried about something, it’s a legitimate worry, Cas. And to have both of them this ….nervous about family I’m betting they know something you don’t.” he offered the only theory he had, being a big brother himself he knew about blind and stupid hopes of protecting the younger from…life, really.

Cas stayed quiet for a time before propping his chin up on Dean’s chest “Something like what?” he asked, the seriousness and need to be answered filling up the question. Dean sighed, making Cas’ head dip a little.

“I don’t know, Cas. It could be anything.” he tried skirting the question.

Castiel leveled him with that one uncomfortable stare that wasn’t like the others they shared “Then speculate anything, Dean.”

Dean glanced away but was almost instantly drawn back by a finger directing his face toward Cas’ own. He groaned in defeat “Sam …noticed they both tend to jump if you touch them when you’re not in their line of sight and they get all stiff when a door opens or something happens too fast. Like….Like they’re…..”

“Like they’re what, Dean?” Cas demanded his face stern and mouth set.

Dean closed his eyes and finished “Like they’re getting ready for a blow.”

He opened his eyes to see blue blown open to the fullest extent and mouth no longer closed, shock and denial written into every feature “No. That can’t…be…They wouldn’t….I would….I would know, Dean! I would-” but Dean’s hand came up from Cas’ waist to squeeze his arm.

“No, you wouldn’t. Not if they didn’t want you to. Not if they were determined you didn’t know.” he explained gently, and he hated watching Cas’ face being pummeled by a devastating, sickening, revelation. 

A door opened downstairs and Cas went to move off of Dean but the Winchester gripped him and made Cas look back to him “This isn’t something they wanted you to know, Cas. And it’s not something you can just talk out. I know you want to…to make it better but bringing this up while your other family is here will only make it worse.” he didn’t realize he had said that in his soldier voice but it was important that Cas understood. Dean couldn’t deal with break downs from anyone just yet and besides, it had a horrible domino affect. You can’t trigger one without having all the others happen as well and he needed to be alert because he stood by what he said. Not a whole lot had fazed Bal, even when he’d thrown out guys twice as big as him at the bar but when he was this freaked out by family…well, something was off and to hell, if Dean wasn’t going to make sure Cas stayed completely fine. Hopefully. 

Cas walked out first despite Dean’s protest and the Winchester followed, the gun being gripped tighter than before. He relaxed when he heard Balthazar’s groan and the basement door opening while Bal called “Tell me when the other two get here and for fuck’s sakes spray some Glade or something!” and then the basement door slammed and annoyed stomping sounded through the house. 

Dean smirked at Cas but the youngest Novak was grimacing at the floor, when he looked at Dean his face was twisted with worry “I can’t just pretend I don’t know, Dean. Why wouldn’t they tell me?”

He put a hand on Cas’ shoulder “Would you tell them, Cas?” he asked, quietly and Castiel shook his head, walking into Dean so the hand could envelop him in a half hug. It was only a couple seconds before Dean’s arms were completely wrapped around Castiel and he seemed to be holding on for his life. 

Dean couldn’t say he knew the feeling but he had remembered when John and Bobby got into when Crowley came into the picture. Words were said, Mary’s disappointment was mentioned, and then John delivered a right cross and Bobby hadn’t come back over to the house for years. It still made Dean felt so helpless to think his father wasn’t what he had always assumed him to be and it was to the point of psychical pain seeing Bobby hurt. That reminded him, he was going to have a talk with Crowley.

They must have been standing there for quite awhile because the sound of car doors opening and closing and the muffled conversation of his brother and Gabriel reached him through the walls.

\---------------------

Once they were all in the kitchen yet again, Gabriel adopted that certain kind of mask, that seemed to build impenetrable walls into his actual emotion, managing to look older than his age as well. Sam resisted going back into his lover’s personal space. He looked at Dean and Sam “They’re going to do their best to intimidate you. The only one who probably won’t is Gadreel but that doesn’t make him on your side. They don’t want you there. They don’t even want us there. This isn’t a vacation. Did you move my guns?” he asked Dean, his voice sharp and brittle like it was just inches away from shattering.

“I have the 9 mil.” Dean shrugged

Gabriel looked to Balthazar and Bal blinked in return, guns weren’t his first choice anyway. “Keep it. Hidden. They’re going to be here soon.” Gabriel said and walked from the room, Sam immediately following.

When they reached the upstairs and Gabriel’s room, the older Novak slumped back into Sam’s chest, Sam would have laughed but he could tell the exhaustion was tangible and so very real. He gently pushed toward Gabriel’s bed until they were lying down, Gabriel splayed out like a starfish and Sam just grateful he hadn’t passed out. He opened his mouth but Gabriel put a hand over it and smiled knowingly “It is absolutely necessary that we undertake this voyage, Captain. I’m very sorry but there’s no way around the Borg.”

Sam smirked “I look like a captain to you?”

Gabriel peered back over, mask thankfully banished again “Maybe not. Bones? Or Number One? Can‘t be Scotty or Spock, our brothers have that title.”

“That’s a weird couple.” Sam said, raising an eyebrow and Gabriel laughed softly.

“So, was Uhura and Spock, but Abrams didn’t care about that. If anyone it, should have been Nurse Chapel or the Captain himself.” Gabriel was relaxing again and Sam was about to continue when there was an audible knock on the front door throughout the house. And just like that, the tension was thrown back on Gabriel and he became stiff even in Sam’s arms. He went to move and got pulled back down again by Sam.

“What? Is this a habit with you?” he quipped, trying to sound playful but it came out soft, almost under his breath.

“Maybe.” Sam smiled but it faded “You shouldn’t go in there tense. Shouldn’t let them know you’re worried. I know you can. I’ve seen it enough times for only a week or so with you but I have a feeling I know you better than they do. It’s important that you don’t.”

Gabriel cocked his head “They can sense fear, can they? And here I was under the impression, you hadn’t met them.” he joked but then nodded slowly and pressed his lips against Sam’s. It felt like he hadn’t done it in ages. Ages being definitive for a couple hours, give or take. When he felt Sam’s tongue swipe across his bottom lip, he groaned easily falling back completely on the bed to be covered by Sam’s weight, opening his mouth. But the sound of footsteps were getting closer and Sam was about to pull away when Gabriel locked his arms around Sam’s neck and delved deeper into the cavern heat of Sam’s mouth, tangling and twisting there tongues, Sam hardly protested and they both heard Balthazar’s muttered “Either both of you love sick couples are moving out or I am moving to the bar.” as he walked away from their doorway. When they had to break for air, Gabriel’s cheeks were red and Sam’s lips were a bit swollen. “What was that for?” he asked

Gabriel smiled “Only way how I know to get rid of stress.” and laughed at Sam’s look of skepticism.

When they did go downstairs they looked half way presentable and were greeted by five very military looking men. Sam noticed Dean leaning against the kitchen doorway with Cas a few feet into the living room, surprisingly not clinging to Dean. Balthazar stood by the door smoking and Sam sent him a look of disbelief but he shrugged and threw his pack to Sam, which was actually already Sam’s. “Should pick up some more before we leave.” he stated, ignoring the five other men in the room and Sam nodded, eyebrow raised.

“They aren’t coming.” Raphael said and Gabriel smirked deviously at him, making the man scowl.

“Well, then, I guess we aren’t either, Rachel.” he pointed out and Raphael swallowed but still glared, except he wasn’t pushing the point any longer and he was ignoring looks of disbelief from Zachariah and Virgil. But Gadreel was smirking back at Gabriel like they had been sharing secrets in there spare time though Gabe didn’t return it.

“Fine. We’re leaving now.” and with that the fourth eldest left the house, getting into a limo waiting outside and the other four following, Gadreel saluting them with two fingers “Well played, big brother.” he said under his breath to Gabriel, making sure Sam caught it as well before he left the house to join the others.

\------------------

They had made sure that the cars would be put in the storage locker and Ellen was watching Jovi (with extra money for chew toys) and Crowley and Bobby had agreed to watch Kansas while Ruby had gotten Pamela to take Sam’s place for the week and the Pie Chart would just be closed for the week. Now they all stood in the private hanger at the airport, the other Novaks boarded already. Cas looked rather sick but so did Gabriel and Balthazar but still the Winchesters were offered one last out. 

“You know you don’t have to come?” Gabriel said, in that small voice again, to Sam but the Winchester didn’t ask for Gabriel’s permission again and just gave him a look that said “I’m going and there isn’t anything you can do about it.” before linking their hands.

Cas was going to say something but Dean’s demanded lips made him forget and the younger Novak was blushing, he looked thoroughly kissed with his hair everywhere and his lips just a tiny bit swollen and wet. Dean went to kiss him again but Balthazar yanked him back “If you think you’ll get away with a trip to the Mile High club in Lucifer’s private jet, you better think again sweetheart.” he said irritable and his hand subconsciously went to his arm before Sam (surprisingly) was the one to pull it away and shared a look of ….was that sympathy? Before taking a deep breath and following Gabriel onto the plane with a very intrigued Balthazar and the other two trailing behind him.


	15. The Devil Doesn't Hit Dogs

The plane had landed in a private airport, somewhere in the Alps. They were now all standing outside of it, breathing in sharp mountain air. Gabriel had thrown warmer clothing layers to the boys before they got off the plane so they weren’t freezing. Gabriel felt calm for the most part, this place was familiar. Dean looked wary but Gabe knew that was mostly because of Zach and Virgil’s stares, the plane ride didn‘t help much either. Balthazar fingers were twitching subtly and Gabriel had the strongest urge to grab his younger brother’s shoulders and tell him nothing bad was going to happen. But he didn’t want to lie. Like the discussion in the bakery, something bad happening was very much a possibility. Cas wasn’t going within 7 feet of Raphael. And Gadreel was at the back of the troupe like always. Uriel elected to stay with the plane until Gadreel came back for the bags.

As Gabriel kicked at some gravel mixed with snow with Sam on his right and Balthazar on his left, he saw Inias leaning against a signature Rolls Royce, with a smile that looked too big for his face. Cas immediately hugged him but Balthazar remained next to Gabriel, a look of respite on his features. “What‘s with the Death Stare?” Gabriel asked, whispering to Balthazar. 

Balthazar glanced at Gabriel “I wasn’t the only one sent after Cas.”

Gabriel frowned and watched as Cas introduced Dean. “I take it Cas doesn’t know that.”

Sam swallowed, trying to get accustomed to the switch in altitude “I’m confused.”

“The little prick didn’t even try looking for Cas.” Gabriel explained 

Sam saw the slight paleness of the man’s skin and sweating in the freezing cold air. “He’s using.”

Bal blinked at Sam, peering suspiciously “Yeah.”

Even with the sallow tinge of epidermis and a bit of the sweats, there’s no way a normal person would notice the craving signs, not after one day at least. And back in Lawrence with stopping Bal from scratching at invisible track marks. Bal was going to have a little talk with Sam. Alone.

Virgil, Zachariah, and Raphael were already in the car and Gadreel sat in the driver seat, waiting for Inias. Sam shifted, imperceptibly moving toward Gabe “There isn’t enough room.”

Gabriel chuckled “Yeah, I know, Sam-I-Am. You couldn’t pay me to ride in that hearse with the Power Puff girls. We’re taking the jeep. It rides better with the mountain road, they’re just being snobs.” and he pointed to a garage a little ways off the runway where the jeep was housed.

“Where are we, anyway?” Sam asked pulling the huge jacket he had on closer before looping an arm with Gabe’s and pulling the extra body heat closer as well.

“Not Switzerland” Gabriel answered loud enough for Cas to hear and got a scowl in return.

Sam’s gaze glued to the snow covered valley walls they were in between, the air sharp in his chest, little needles prickling his lungs from being far above sea level than normal. “Why not Switzerland again?” he asked as the group heading toward the garage while Gadreel drove the other four away down a barely used road. Gabriel just waggled his eyebrows at Sam.

Gabriel pulled up the garage door, revealing a yellow jeep with the keys in the seat. Dean grabbed them before Gabriel could “I’m driving!”

“Oh, you know the way to Castle Black, do ya?” Gabriel asked, the keys were thrown at him moments later and everyone got in the jeep. Dean and Cas in the back with Sam and Balthazar up front with Gabriel.

“It’s not really-Heh, not really called Castle Black, is it?” Dean asked, sounded a mix between joking and unsure just as the jeep kicked into life and followed the tracks in the snow made by the Rolls. 

Gabriel snorted “If only. Dad was much more pretentious.”

Sam quirked an eyebrow, curious now. “Then what’s it called?”

“Heaven. Castle Heaven.” Balthazar said, watching mountain walls pass by and scowling.

Sam snorted, half smiling and nodding “I’d say you’re kidding but knowing you guys…although Lucifer in Heaven. Your dad religious much?”

Cas looked into the review mirror and met Sam’s gaze “I think he was trying to make a mockery of it. Not honoring it.”

“And we get named after angels. Lucky us.” Gabriel finished, the valley wall on their right disappeared and suddenly the road was hugging the side of a mountain, the right side a fantastic view of snow capped mountains and small insignificant valleys. Sam gasped and Dean scooted closer to the left side of the jeep. But the road split up ahead, one going straight, following the view and hugging the mountain. The other road was obscured. Gabriel turned and they were driving into a hidden forest of evergreen trees, in a secluded valley.

About a mile in the forest they reached an iron fence connecting into a stone arch with Old English text engraved in the archway, the inscription reading “Heaven”.

And three miles after that the castle finally came into view. It was old and breath-taking. Three towers rising from its dark main bulk, pinnacles and spires and flying buttresses and so many uses of Gothic architecture mixed with Romanesque and even touches of Baroque with neo-Gothic floating around the edges like some demonic presence, a small building off to the side, most likely a stable, was washed in Corinthian. It clashed horribly and wonderfully, not one type but all. Like its creator shamed the thought of using one singular architectural design, deigning himself God and making Heaven collide with Hell. This place shouldn’t even be feasible and Sam was confused how the architect had imagined such a monstrosity. It was like the cathedral of Notre Dame twisted into Hogwarts and a bit of Buckingham Palace in case you missed the other parts that screamed royalty. It demanded your attention but destroyed compliments; it was to be gaped at. But it wasn’t beautiful. Not at all like its name. Elegant, perhaps but in the way Henry the 8th was. Dangerously so. Not something to be lusted after or tampered with. Something to be feared, Daddy Novak had obviously been trying to prove a point. Sam guessed correctly in assuming it looked positively horrifying at night although it had its own eerie effect in the daylight as well, it‘s shadows playing against the mountain behind it. It looked very much like it belonged in a story with knights and dragons and monsters. Sam felt his mouth move to say as much and Gabriel laughed.

“I don’t know about knights and I’m pretty sure there’s no dragon in the dungeon. Monsters, on the other hand. Well, there are plenty of those.” Gabriel teased, but there was a ring of truth to his statement. A little thread of warning that made Dean and Sam think twice of exploring. Or at least slightly dimmed the sudden need. 

Stones and snow crunched under the jeep’s tires as it slowed in front of giant, polished, mahogany doors and Balthazar muttered “Well, I guess there’s no turning back now.” 

Gabriel got out of the car, Sam following behind him “Gabe, what about the luggage in the plane?”

“Gadreel’s taking the jeep back to get it.” he answered just as the quiet man came out of the doors with a giant black dog on his heels, making Dean curse in surprise. Gabriel put his palm so it faced the ground and the dog stopped immediately, sitting down and tongue lolling out of its mouth. Gadreel nodded and plucked the keys from Gabriel’s fingers, before getting in jeep. 

Balthazar remained where he was seated, smiling at them “I’ll uh give him a hand, yeah?”

Cas frowned at the leaving jeep before turning to Gabriel “Is he okay?”

“Oh, pft. He just doesn’t want to have go through all the fake happy greetings and he’s also sneaking a joint, how much you wanna bet, the bastard.” Gabriel pouted and Sam grinned mischievously as a promise of later, before kneeling down and rubbing the giant canine’s neck and head, the tags jangling from a black leather collar, reading ’Davos’.

“Davos, huh? That’s a cool name.” he said and the dog licked his face in return.

Gabriel grinned when the dog nosed at his hand “He was a barely older than a puppy when I left, I had him trained and everything but I couldn’t take him with me. Gadreel took him out of pity because no one else knew how to take care of a domestic dog. Which is a retarded. Anyway, he’s a pure bred, a Great Dane. The name was because of a town not far from here, a good memory that‘s all.” and he twisted his palm so it was slanted. The dog, now free of commands, practically jumped on Sam, licking and sniffing at the other scent of Jovi. Sam laughed and pushed him off, standing.

Gabriel kneeled then and Davos nosed at his hands before barking happily then proceeding to bowl Gabe over as well after Gabriel got back up to at least his knees he ran his hands over the dog.

Dean frowned “What are you doing?”

Gabriel sighed heavily “Checking for injuries.” almost as soon as he said it, the great mess of dog whined when Gabriel pressed gently into one of Davos’ ribs. Sam immediately scowled.

“Who could hit him? He’s a big sweetheart.” Sam growled but Davos just seemed pleased to have his original master back within licking distance.

“No one. The other dogs are….not friendly” Cas answered, glancing around like he was expecting one to appear

Dean raised an eyebrow, entwining their fingers “Not Lucifer? The devil doesn’t hit dogs?” 

“He’s not the devil, Dean.” Cas said, glaring at the castle now “Not here, anyway.”

Gabriel shook his head and scrubbed at Davos’ head “Luci is ….provoked. Usually. I mean, he’s a bastard that you don’t fuck with but Michael and Raphael start most of the major shit and everyone else just follows them. Luci actually likes dogs, and like Cas said there’s two other ones somewhere on the property. Only Lucifer can actually go near them without the threat of being bitten. Davos is bigger than them but he’s gentle. Normally.” his fingers retracting from the spot “It’s just a bruise so there isn’t much I can do for him.”

“You could fix him up if he was seriously hurt?” Sam came to stand next to the kneeling Gabe, Davos rolled onto his belly wiggling against the cold snow beneath and Gabriel rubbed his belly vigorously before answering.

“Heh, no, Sam. But there‘s a village with a vet about 60 miles on the mountain road, that way.” he said , standing as Davos rolled back onto four legs and sat next to the two men, looking much like a statue of a guard dog. When Gabriel looked to the mahogany doors he saw why. 

Michael.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH! HI! i'M BACK! i'M NOT DEAD! heheheHELLHOUNDS AND aRchITECTURE PORN AND YES IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG BUT IM BACK NOW PLEASE FORGIVE ME ARUGH I WAS SO BUSY IM SORRY


	16. Fears To Share

Lucifer watched Michael seethe and pace in front of Raphael while Lucifer looked on from above them, standing on the second of the library while they remained on the first floor, assuming they were meeting in secret. Stupid. They didn’t even bother checking the ground floor and Lucifer could see Hester hidden in an alcove of books as well. He snorted and didn’t try muffling the sound but still no one noticed his presence. He smiled to himself as Michael exploded and started yelling at the peeved looking Raphael. He shook his head and started making loud footsteps down the stairs, drawing everyone’s attention. As if Raphael served Michael, he thought bitterly as he recalled Gadreel’s phone call and Gabriel‘s threat. They were so blind. So mistaken. Oh, his little brothers would soon learn things aren’t what they appear to be. He felt a faint flicker of pity but it needed to happen. Ignorance was not bliss, perhaps it was gentler than the truth, but it was ignorance nonetheless and it would be destroyed come Saturday.

Michael glared at him “You had something to do with this, didn’t you? At the very least, you knew! That they brought their …..“ and Lucifer couldn’t help but watch in amusement as Michael faltered trying to find a demeaning term that sounded harsh and convincing enough “-their sluts!” 

Lucifer crooked an eyebrow and bit away his smirk but to no success as it stretched his lips across his face. At least he swallowed the comment he wanted to say “Now, who would tell you such nasty lies about me?” he purred and watched the anger his brother never could control dim at the calm tone he kept his voice in. He was slipping. Michael was slowly giving in.

He was stalking toward Lucifer in minutes with a familiar gleam in his eyes that Lucifer knew all to well, he took a step backward but only one then stood tall and waited till Michael was in front of him, breathing hard as if the air that he expelled from his lungs could take the hatred that was slowly consuming him and push it out into the air “This is all your fault. You embraced the sin that they did and let it consume you. You’re weak. Pathetic.” he growled lowly, Lucifer knew that Raphael had left them alone and a quick glance to the alcove to make sure it was empty. Oh, he would speak his own rebuttal if his younger siblings were there or not but the now empty room gave him free reign. 

He grinned wider and took a step closer to Michael, heavy breaths mingling with Lucifer’s calm breathing “They’re gone; you know….No, Michael. I didn’t embrace sin, I embraced what I am. I may have dropped the leash to my morals, true. I may be weak, as you say, except…” he put his finger to his lip and looked up innocently before looking back at his brother with nothing but hunger “…I’ve tasted something you still deny. But denial doesn’t quench the want, does it?” 

And surprise, surprise, Michael’s breath quickened and Lucifer toyed with the idea he could hear his older brother’s heart beat pick up as Lucifer took another step closer. He saw his brother’s pupils dilate and watched the same hunger he felt start to creep into Michael’s eyes but a protest came with panic in the undertones “No. This… this is wrong. I’m your brother.”

He couldn’t help but show his teeth when he smirked again “Oh, Michael, like this would be the worst thing you’ve ever done to a brother. Heh, to me. And we both know, Michael, I‘m not your brother by anyone‘s blood. A signature on a piece of paper is nothing.” he said under his breath, trapping Michael against a table with his arms and watched as his brother’s resolve crumbled and fell. 

“I’ve never meant for this to happen. I…have so much….anger…it’s taking me, Lu. All of it. I’m not who I was. He wouldn’t….Everything he taught….They just assumed I went against him…Gabriel thinks I‘ve…..” and Lucifer said nothing as the steel voice broke and Michael’s stature seemed to fold down into two sizes too small and this isn’t what the younger wanted but it was what the older needed and Lucifer would make sure their Father wasn’t going to be the one to give Michael anything anymore “God, what have I done, Lu? What have I done?”

Lucifer knew what he meant. Michael regretted almost everything he’d done regarding their younger siblings. Albeit Michael had never actually laid a hurtful hand, his words were all that was needed to make someone feel small and pathetic and insignificant. Raphael would probably be forbidden from the castle if Michael knew what he’d grown up to become. The one time Lucifer did catch the fourth eldest standing over a bloody much too young Balthazar, Raphael had learned the reason their Father renamed him after the devil. Though no one but Raphael knew what he’d done. And Gabriel…oh, the third of them. He knew very little of their Father’s true nature. Lucifer and Michael had ensured that, playing off bruises and cuts as clumsiness or fights spawned from their apparent hatred for each other. And yet, still the boy had grown up mimicking their instincts, reacting at certain things that Lucifer knew Michael would react to and he prayed that the little parrot would find something else to mimic lest someone ask or tell him what it means to be afraid of someone who isn’t in your vision or the instinctive fear that settles in the pit of your stomach like a stone when the door slams. But he hadn’t, he’d grown up thinking it was normal. And Anna, his curious little sister. Yes, well, the cat and how the saying goes. His pity had stopped after her. Michael and himself, they had a lot to atone for and perhaps too much to ever seek their siblings forgiveness but they knew. They knew each other and what they had given up to keep their siblings ignorance. 

Except, Michael was in too deep again. And he would provoke and prod at Gabriel because that’s what he was told to do. Michael was just the good son. Following Daddy’s orders. Moving across the chessboard like a sacrificial pawn for their Father, Lucifer felt his own anger flare but he forced his words to stay steady “You don’t have to, you know. You could stop. You could leave. This …” he looked around before looking back “….all of this. We don’t need to obey him. We can leave. You can tell them. They wouldn’t listen to him, Michael. Not anymore.”

“I can’t.” was whispered. Like the last time and the time before that. But Lucifer wasn’t going to give up this time, he had a vendetta to secure and he was getting Michael out, even if it killed him this time 

“Do you know what He’d do?” Michael sounded so scared now and Lucifer couldn’t help but find that question tedious.

“What do you think, Michael?” he asked above a whisper 

Michael had the good sense to look guilty before he shook his head “This will be the last time. I promise. They don’t need to know. It‘s better if they don‘t know.”

Lucifer sighed. He hated when Michael promised anything. His father wasn’t going to just remove hooks like the ones in Michael without proper motivation. Motivation being fear. He blinked at that thought and wondered if Gadreel had found anything out. They will know, he told himself, they will know before this week is up. But for now. He took another step and if he took another, his leg would be slotted between Michael’s. His hunger was back. 

When he was right on the verge, the one last step to make Michael surrender to him, the library doors opened and Gadreel stood there, expression unreadable as always. Lucifer knew Gadreel was quite aware of Lucifer’s ongoing …well, there just wasn’t another word for it but seduction of Michael. This was simply confirming that knowledge. But he didn’t like Gadreel interrupting him when it would have taken nothing but a kiss and Michael was his. He breathed in through his nose, pulling away and took the slight pleasure offered to him when Michael looked disappointed. He raised his eyebrow and mouthed “Later.” to Michael and watched as the earlier panic came back but that didn’t matter. He would visit again and Michael would break. 

Gadreel just looked bored and told in a monotone voice “They’re outside. I will be getting the bags.” and left, closing the doors behind him.

Michael was still leaning against the table but Lucifer was now walking back up the stairs. Michael went to the base of them and looked up at Lucifer “What are you doing to me?” he asked, his voice no longer accusing but curious and hungry. Finally hungry like Lucifer had been, still is. He turned to look down at Michael.

“I‘m getting out of Heaven, Michael. And this time, you‘re coming with me.”

\------------------ 

_He looked down at the trap sinking its sharp teeth into his ankle, he twisted it and felt the metal scrape against his bone and he growled into the cold air. “Bear traps. Motherfucking bear traps in the godforsaken mountains.”_

_As if the night wasn’t already hell on earth, he sighed and realized he needed to calm down and gather up what strength he had if he was going to pry open a goddamn bear trap in 5 below weather. He sat down on the cold ground, evergreen needles poking at his palms when he tried putting them down on the forest floor as well._

_He looked up toward the dark castle and couldn’t help but curl his upper lip. They could’ve gotten out. They were so close. But Michael had to stay, said that He’d take it out the two younger ones. Fuck, if Lucifer knew that a day before he would’ve made it so they could’ve all gotten to the village and who knows where from there but just away from the drunk that was their father. Well, not his father, not really. He had found the adoption papers months ago but he still hadn’t had the courage or perhaps the faith to tell Michael. Gabriel was barely four and Raphael only one, with their step mother pregnant already. They couldn’t survive here. Not unaffected._

_It already started, if he was to actually think about it. Obviously, he means, he’s alone in the fucking woods because Michael had been pitted against him by their father. He heard a branch snap and panic and adrenaline helped him open the steel metal maw of the trap, he tried taking off at a run but it was more of lope and it only sent him right into Michael. He tried going around him but fell and realized how vulnerable he was. He looked up at his brother, the shadows of the forest concealing his face but Lucifer knew by the way he was standing he seemed full of regret but also determination. Oh, Christ, what had their Father told him to do? “Micha? Micha, please. Another day and I can have it so we can all get out, you don’t need to listen to him. He’s mad, Micha, he’s gone crazy on vodka and sex. We need to leave.”_

_There was sounds of barking and he watched as Michael tensed, never did like that sound or the source, for that matter. But Michael pulled him to his feet and looked down at the injured one, trying to frown but the split lip cracking open and blood coming to well up against his lips. He came to carry half of Lucifer‘s weight. “Lucifer, you’re hurt. You won’t make it past the fence.”_

_“Yes. Yes, I can. We can. Micha, we’ll come back for Gabriel. For Raphael but we need to leave. Micha, please, I don‘t want to die here.” he felt the hot burn of water scorching into his eyes and dripping down his cheeks, even the water seemed to press too hard into the bruise forming around his eye. He needed Michael. He need out._

_Michael’s brown eyes were full of fear and the same scalding water but he shook his head “He’ll kill us. He’ll kill us if we leave.”_

_“He’ll kill us if we stay, Micha!” he pleaded, it wouldn’t be long before He would come looking for them, they needed to be past the gate, the bar keeper was waiting. They could get out. But it was then Lucifer realized he wouldn’t be leaving. Not without those soft brown eyes, not without Michael. So when Michael said “He won’t. He won’t ever come near you. Not anymore.” Lucifer couldn’t find it in himself to argue anymore and they were limping back toward Heaven._

\----------------------

Michael was to the library doors when Lucifer called out again “They’re going to find out, Michael. And we _are_ leaving Heaven, if I have to kill the bastard.”

Brown eyes looked back to him and Lucifer couldn’t help the swell of pride in his chest when he saw what was in them.

Hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's going to get a wee bit complicated from here, love. The POV is liable to switch every chapter and like I said in the tags there's lots of people assuming things they shouldn't. Hope you don't mind too much


	17. That Label You've Got On Your Forehead

Michael tried standing tall after he closed the door to the library and to his ….distraction. However, that plan failed and his whole body seemed to weigh tons as he sagged against the door, exhausted before anything had even begun. He wasn’t quite sure he could do this. Gabriel had been one of the main reasons he stayed and now whatever hope for a new start that Gabriel held onto he was going to rip from his baby brother’s clutches and burn it. He turned and was about to open the doors, to run back to Lucifer and the strength and calmness and safety he had found in Lucifer but a soft hand on his shoulder made him go rigid with his well played façade and he turned, fire sparking to life in suddenly obsidian eyes. But it was only the maid, she may as well be his sister for how long he’s known her, for all that she’s done for…well, done for Lucifer. For the both of them, really. “Lilith.” he said, tiredly.

The dirty blonde-haired woman said nothing but gave him a look that clearly stated the Master of the house did not address her by anything other than servant or girl. Nevertheless, he didn’t want that title. He wanted….his throat went dry and he pushed the thoughts away. Lucifer was his brother. _A signature on a piece of paper is nothing_. And, fuck, if he could have sworn that Lucifer was right there, whispering that into his ear like some unholy bargaining chip, like a pagan’s prayer. He didn’t realize he had turned back to the library doors and was only stopped by Lilith’s strong voice “You have guests to make squirm. He will wait for you, Michael. He always does.”

When he turned to hiss that he did not intend to break the last thread of trust Gabriel put in him the woman was gone and with one last withering look to the library doors, he pushed himself back to full height. He walked proudly (a lie, it may be, but damn it all if he wouldn’t make them believe it) to the main hall and his younger brothers. Trying to push Lucifer’s smile and teeth, tongue, and _oh, fuck_. He stopped in the hall and squeezed his eyes shut. Besides the fact, that his pants were entirely too small now, he could feel Lucifer’s eyes watching him, somewhere hidden, and somewhere most likely above them all for the better view. He wasn’t going to be able to last a week. He was too drained, too tired to keep up appearances for a bastard that didn‘t even care. “Father, forgive me.” he mumbled and he wasn’t quite sure who he was addressing anymore as he came to stand in the doorway. Because he didn’t want forgiveness. In addition, he would never ask his Father for anything. 

He had to fight back the shocked gasp. His little brother wasn’t little. Wasn’t an angry college student who ran away. Wasn’t an accusing man who bailed out the youngest when Michael all but murdered their Father when He told Michael to let them stay in prison. He was the brother who stepped up to fill what should be Michael’s title. He felt grateful to him. Lucifer was right. They needed to know.

Gabriel looked quite well, happy even. Castiel did as well. The two men they were with were obviously the cause and Michael felt unwarranted happiness whip through him. How was he ever to complete this task when he could only feel happiness that his brothers had found someone? His mind darkened. Rebellion that was supposed to be ash and dust ripped back into life. He wasn’t completing anything.

He told too many lies. He had promised too many things. He was done. However, going and embracing siblings that thought him to be naught but the same bastard their father was wasn’t how he planned on starting. He would find a way. He and Lucifer would find a way. 

Gabriel clearly stiffened at the sight of him while the rest of the group remained tentative and cast curious glances between them. He said nothing. He didn’t bother to approach Gabriel, he knew better than that. He just blinked and nodded slowly before sweeping back into the castle and making a mad dash for the study.

Raphael wanted him to report, to tell Father that the plan was proceeding well. “When?” he asked the corridor but mainly himself or maybe Lucifer if he was still in the shadows somewhere near. When had his brother become so blindly loyal to a man that did nothing to deserve loyalty. Or love. Or anything that wasn’t the dungeons below his feet.

\--------------------------

Gabriel stared at the spot Michael had been in and felt confusion wash over him. “What the hell?” he mumbled and Sam laced their fingers together.

“What? What is it?” Sam said following his gaze.

Cas was the one who answered though “He was very…..reserved. For someone who-”

“Who is one of the biggest homophobic assholes I’ve met.” Gabriel finished before Cas could and Dean glared at Gabe.

“Well, it didn’t look like it.” the older Winchester replied as Cas pulled him toward the doors while Sam tugged on his hand and gave Gabe a questioning look but the Novak waved at him to follow them into the castle. Davos trailed after Sam.

Gabe frowned to himself, Michael had always been brazen and harsh as soon as Gabriel came back to the castle, had always been ready to shove another insult at him but there had always been this look of apology after every word so Gabriel assumed he was being pitied as well as insulted. But _that_. That look. That was something he had seen on Sam’s face that night in Topeka. It was infectious. Michael looked apologetic, determined, and _hopeful_.

That Michael was the one that had filled Gabriel’s childhood memories, that Michael was the one that told Gabriel he could be anything he wanted to be and Michael would always be proud of him. The one before the competition for their father’s attention began. The one that thought the world was huge but still needed to be explored. The one that bandaged up Gabe after a fall. The one that made him feel safe. _That_ was his older brother. 

What had changed? 

What the fuck was going on?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a bit short but i should start updating weekly again possibly daily if I can finsih my blah blah personal shit you don't care about but yeah hopefully i can.


	18. Bite Your Tongue ....Or Your Fist, That Works Too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UH WELL blowjobs and a bit of a temperature play if you squint

Gabriel took a deep breath and walked up the three steps and pass the giant doors and into the dimly lit foyer of the castle. Sam was talking softly with Dean whereas Cas had been drawn once again into a conversation with Inias. His other brothers had retreated to unknown parts of the castle and Gabe couldn’t help but feel a tiny bit relieved. 

The foyer looked like it always did, two giant staircases on either side going up and connecting with a corridor that led you to the study and the library and other corridors which you followed to mostly strange bedrooms and rooms filled with their Father‘s trinkets and the meaningless things he brought back from trips.. Under the connecting stairways was another hallway but a locked door blocked it off and Gabriel knew well that behind that door was his Father’s bedroom and personal study, along with other rooms Gabe had never set foot in. 

There were two doors on either side of the room as well, one leading into a parlor and the other into what was used as a large sitting room. Basically, they all kind of looked the same but had different names. 

Sam came up to stand next to him with his face barely hiding his curiosity and Gabriel grinned, shaking his head “We’ll walk around later, alright?”

Sam feigned looking bored with that notion but his eyes were dancing with barely hidden excitement. Gabriel envied his lover, all he felt was dread. Inias made some kind of excuse and walked up to the stairs. Gabriel’s eyes flickered to the banister where the stairs connected, watching Inias disappear and felt his confusion grow. 

Lucifer was leaning against the marble railing, looking down at the four of them with a smile. Not one of his sinister grins or the kind of smirk that put Gabriel’s and Azazel’s to shame, just a simple smile that was actually graced with satisfaction and a touch of happiness. Unnaturally pale blue eyes locked with his and they flickered to Sam before the smile widened “Hello, little brother.” 

That caught the others attention but Lucifer had yet to retract his gaze and Gabriel stood his ground, lifting a questioning eyebrow. Lucifer just raised both of his and let his teeth show in the smile that looked to be splitting his face. “Been awhile.” his voice purred and Gabriel was reminded of that voice reading stories to him so he would fall asleep faster. 

But he pushed that memory away “Yeah, since Anna.” he answered.

Lucifer heaved a sigh and nodded, as if he was confirming something for himself and broke their stare, turning and walking away down the corridor. 

Castiel shared a look with Dean then stepped closer to Gabriel “What was that about?”

Gabe was still staring at the spot Lucifer had been in before glancing at Cas then immediately going back as if he was expecting his older brother to reappear “I have no idea.”

Cas shifted, looking uncomfortable “Inias said dinner would be in two hours and we’ll be staying in our old rooms.”

Gabriel nodded, finally tearing his eyes away to look at Sam then Cas “That’s fine.”

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose “My and Balthazar’s chambers are kitty corner to each others. Yours, however, are on the other side of the castle.”

“Chambers?” Dean asked skeptically.

Cas blushed and Gabe let out an annoyed sigh when Cas started explaining “The rooms are like a four room apartment. Chambers is a better name then bedroom because it actually has a master bathroom, a small living room and another bedroom.”

Dean nodded slowly, pursing his lips “Okay then. Chambers it is.”

It was Castiel’s turn to look annoyed with Gabriel “That isn’t the issue.”

Gabriel couldn’t help but looked surprised and a little disbelieving “I’ll be fine, Cas. ‘sides, I got Sasquatch here to keep me company.”

Sam snorted but let his arm be pulled around Gabriel’s shoulder and kissed his cheek. “I’ll keep him out of trouble.”

Castiel looked unconvinced “Yes, but who’ll keep you out of it?”

Dean groaned and bumped Cas’ arm with his own “They’ll be fine. C’mon, take me to your chambers.” Dean said, wiggling his eyebrows and Cas’ cheeks tinged pink again. Gabriel made a disgusted face and Sam looked like he was trying to bleach his mind of the mental image as Castiel tugged Dean up the stairs.

Sam smiled when Gabriel titled his head back against Sam’s shoulder, exposing his neck and crooking an eyebrow at Sam when the Winchester sighed contently before looking up and around then back down “It was a long flight. So, does your room-oh, forgive me, do your chambers happen to have a balcony I can smoke on or should I go back outside?”

Gabriel blinked tiredly; it had been a long flight. “No, but there’s a veranda near it.” he said pulling away and yawning. It was dusk, the sun was almost behind the mountains and the missing hours of sleep were tugging at Gabe’s eyelids in a weak protest.

Sam chuckled “You look like hell.”

“Awh, thanks, baby.” Gabriel grumbled as they started to walk up the steps, they reached the corridor and Sam pulled him back closer. Pressing another chaste kiss to his lips. 

“You’re welcome, sweetie.” he replied sarcastically as they turned right off the main hallway, Gabriel’s nerves calming more than seemed possible in this place.

“I don’t know what changed.” he said as they turned yet again and Sam hoped Gabriel knew where he was going, he didn’t want to end up lost “But it’s not what I was expecting. What I remembered. I mean, there’s still this dark black ….thing just floating behind everything but still. Michael and Lucifer….something changed. With them, though. Everything else is still….Addam’s family with an evil vibe.”

Sam just nodded “I got that. They didn’t seem to be the way you described them.”

Gabriel frowned at that “Technically, Samsquatch, I didn’t describe them. I described their anger. But, when I was here the last time, anger was the definition of them. You know?”

“I think I do. What were they mad about?” Sam asked, as he was pulled down a hallway that was lit solely by candles and again, Sam thought it almost resembled Hogwarts in some ways.

Gabriel shrugged “Hell if I know, but I didn’t stay long enough to find out. Didn’t feel like leaving my younger brothers in lock up.” he said, and he stopped by closed white French doors leading out to a balcony.

Sam nodded again, digging in his pocket for his cigarettes and lighter before pulling open one of the doors and immediately felt sharp wind cut into him, he shivered. Gabriel walked out first and Sam followed, closing the doors behind him. He pulled a single out of the carton and clasped it with his lips, flicking the lighter and cupping around it so the wind wouldn’t blow out the flame. The embers of the Marlboro glowed as the fire licked the end of the cigarette to life and Sam inhaled his addiction. The slight stress he did have slipped away when he watched Gabriel lean against the stone rail that closed them in. The view was beautiful if a bit terrifying, the castle, it seemed, was perched at the edge of a cliff, a drop off that faded into a black abyss and bordered by the white rocky mountains. The stars, however, were multiple and captivating. That’s what Gabriel was staring at, but Sam….Sam was staring at Gabriel. “I’ve been almost everywhere and there still isn’t a place where the stars are this clear and visible. It’s breath-taking.”

The Winchester smiled as such a blatant opportunity presented itself and of course, he took it “Yeah, I’d have to agree.” and he threw his gaze up toward the sky before Gabriel could see that Sam had been staring at him instead of deep blue blanket above them. He sucked in more nicotine and wondered what would happened if he told Gabriel. There was just so much to tell. And he really didn’t trust himself enough; chances were he’d make the commitment and then bail. He really didn’t want to do that to Gabriel and he wasn’t sure he’d recover again. He stole another breath before flicking the bud off and watching it fall down into the abyss then snuck closer to Gabriel, the Novak not realizing he was as close as he was when he turned to say something to Sam but choked on it instead when he noticed Sam‘s predatory eyes and Sam had him virtually pinned up against the stone railing.

So, if he couldn’t tell him, he’d show him.

“Sam?” Gabriel asked, his voice a hoarse whisper and his gaze shot to the French doors before looking back to Sam. 

Sam leaned in and pressed their lips together, softly and slowly like there was no urgency, just a kiss but Gabriel could tell by the roving hands that kept dipping down, Sam had more plans then making out. He pulled away and let out a shaking breath “Sam, it’s in the forties, I’m cold. The room is only-” but lips cut him off again, Sam’s tongue going deeper and licking at everything he could reach, Gabriel forgot why he was protesting and moaned, letting the Winchester plunder his mouth. But the kiss didn’t speed up or become desperate, just lazy and fulfilling. It was… (Gabriel would scoff at this later) tender. As if he was being cherished. Sam drew back before putting a quick chaste kiss after and smiled at Gabriel’s loss for words before kneeling, cupping the backs of Gabriel’s knees and grinning when shock seeped into Gabriel’s features. His hands came up and undid Gabriel’s belt buckle then the button and slowly ~~ohsofuckingslowly~~ pulled down his zipper, his cock grateful for the small relief of pressure all the while Gabriel was stuttering over half formed protest “Sa-It’s too cold-I can’t-We should-Oh my god-Fuck-Sam-Someone might see-Oh-oh shit-wait-ah” but they were cut of when Sam deliberately blew hot breath over his boxer-clad erection and he brought his fist up to his mouth, shoving it in and biting down to muffle his moan as he saw someone walk by the French doors. He sent a silent prayer that whoever it was wasn’t looking for them as Sam leaned forward, repeating his actions from last night and mouthing at the clothed prick. Gabriel’s hips jutted forward and he bit down harder on his knuckles. There was still no desperation in either mans’ movements, it was almost agonizing except that Gabriel didn’t want it to be rushed and Sam had no intention of quickening his pace.

He pulled back and looked up at Gabriel with such a smug grin that Gabe wanted to just leave him out there on the balcony on his knees but he wouldn’t. Not when those pretty green eyes seemed to be flecked with gold shavings and they were staring right into Gabriel’s own, like there was something Sam was saying without speaking. Gabriel’s free hand clasped onto the stone railing when Sam tugged his boxers down. The chilled air feeling like ice when it hit his swollen cock and he gasped around his fist, teeth sinking into his flesh and his other hand clenching harder at the stone when Sam‘s hot mouth engulfed his tip. He had never viewed temperature as a kink, he knew some people did but he had didn’t see the appeal to hot wax and ice cubes being dragged or dribbled across his skin, but now, Sam’s liquid heat of a mouth and the freezing mountain air kissing his skin and burning his lungs were rapidly changing his mind as his cock twitched in Sam’s mouth. Sam looked up at him through half-lidded eyes that seemed to agree with Gabriel’s assessment and Sam took him in a little further as his cold fingers came up to play at the exposed skin of his hip, making Gabriel thrust up again. Sam didn’t try holding his hips down and Gabe felt heady with that kind of trust, all he’d have to do was hold Sam’s head in place and fuck his throat raw. But he would save that for another time, when Sam was willing, for now he was quite enjoying Sam’s attentions and teasing licks as he bobbed his head again, taking Gabe further into the wet fire, moaning obscenely when a drop of precome fell onto his tongue making Gabriel jerk against him. Gabe moaned around his fist, forcing his hips to stay. 

Yet another person walked by and Gabriel was about to just pull Sam off and continue their adventures later when he felt that warm heat in his stomach move further down and he was way too close to stop _now_ so he sent yet another silent prayer that they wouldn’t be caught because first day home and you’re found out on the balcony with your boyfriend’s mouth on your dick? Not exactly the best impression. Sam twirled his tongue around him and took him down all the way, Gabriel’s cock hitting the back of his throat before Gabriel realized Sam had suppressed his gag reflex. He broke the skin around his knuckles trying to silence his ecstasy. He was so _close_. 

Sam’s chilled fingers drifted down into the dirty blonde curls at the base of his cock, barely brushing over his balls before going back to tease the base making Gabriel whimper again, his head falling back and eyes squeezing shut because he can’t keep watching Sam’s mouth move like that and he wants to moan or scream or just something. He pulls his hand away and locks it against the stone like his other, his voice shaking as he started breathing out encouragement “Sam. Fu-Fucking hell. Yes. Sam. Uhn, right there, g-god.”

Sam flattened his tongue and licked up the underside of Gabriel’s cock, another dribble of precome leaking into his mouth, he gave a pleased sound and rubbed harder, his tongue almost rough like a cat’s making Gabriel keen, his shoulders moving forward instead of his hips. “Ss-“ he tried but his breath caught before he could finish. His eyes shot open and his gaze immediately went downward to his lover on his knees. Sam’s chestnut hair was brushed behind his ears, his nose and cheeks flushed with both the activity and the cold, his eyes focused on Gabriel’s face and his swollen red lips moving easily on a saliva slicked path of Gabriel’s cock. “Sam.“ he finally managed to get out, his breath still missing “You’re so beautiful li-like this.” he whined. 

Sam’s eyes had turned back into that kaleidoscopic color again as he licked directly into Gabriel’s slit making Gabe gasp in surprise, hand leaving the railing to move Sam off but Sam’s hands came up and grasped his hip bones, pushing deeper and swallowing around Gabriel and sucking hard. Gabriel was gone, bliss overtaking his nerve endings and his vision blurring into white flashes as Sam swallowed every pulse, milking Gabriel till he was spent and more exhausted then before they started. Standing up and letting the third Novak lean against his chest, golden sleepy eyes watching his face as Sam tucked him back into his boxers and did up his jeans, leaving the belt for Gabe to redo then wrapping his arms around him. He kissed Gabriel again, barely more than 15 seconds before he pulled away, smiling 

Gabe blinked sleepily “We have to go sit down. At a table. With my family. Are you proud of yourself?” he said, trying to sound annoyed but it came out like he was high. He still kinda was. 

Sam just grinned cheekily “Very much so.”

He shook his head about to push off of Sam and drag him to the dining room when he felt Sam’s own hardness poking into his hip. He looked down before looking back up “Sam.” he said, almost as if he was scolding a child.

The Winchester shook his head, red lips twisting “It can wait.”

He was about to protest when Balthazar opened the doors and walked out onto the veranda “Everyone’s in the outer room and you did something nasty” he said, one statement rushing into each before he turned right back around, going back inside and shaking his head.

Gabriel couldn’t help but chuckle a little as he watched his brother go before peering back at Sam when an idea hit him. He had been taken off guard. He’d like to return to the favor. Although he‘d doubt Sam would thank him for it later “C’mon, Sammy, mustn’t keep the Novaks waiting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep telling myself I'm not going to antagonize Balthazar anymore ~~andthenIdo~~....Again sorry about the name change blame Alex ~~thelittefuckertotallycheated~~


	19. Dinner Table Etiquette;You're Doing It Wrong

The Dining room was quite elegant. A long polished table with a white table cloth underneath the plates, glasses and silverware. Most of the house occupants were already seated and engaged in conversation about one thing or another. Sam belatedly noticed that no chair seat at either end, virtually meaning no Head or Master of the house. Gabriel tugged him down into the chair next to him, Balthazar on the other side of the table glaring at Gabe who just smiled innocently. Dean and Cas took the seats next Bal, both looking thoroughly ragged as well. Balthazar groaned loud enough for their group to hear and put his head in his hands. The Winchesters at the end of the table so no other family member but their lover could be seated by them, they both felt immensely grateful for that.

A woman in jeans and graphic t-shirt, her platinum blonde hair swooped up into a messy bun with stray strands framing her face and giving her a bookish look as she sat in the free seat next to Bal. Raising an eyebrow at Balthazar defeated pose “Really, Bal? You don’t get to make that expression till you move back here.”

Balthazar looked up momentarily and sighed deeply “Hester, darling, you have no idea.”

“Really? Because they-” she motioned to both couples “They _have_ sex. I live with eight introverted men who barely speak to each other and when they do it’s either screaming or in foreign languages. They’ve all but taken a vow of abstinence and, god help me, are the most misogynistic bastards who I’ve ever proven wrong. Multiple times. And I’m still treated as if I’ll break any second now. Do not start with me, little brother.”

Castiel opened his mouth to say something but Hester narrowed her eyes in a challenge “You and I will be having a talk later.”

Cas’ mouth snapped shut and Gabriel snorted “You’re scaring people, again, Hester.”

“What would I ever do without your extraordinary deductive powers, Sherlock?” she quipped just as Lucifer sat down next to her. His shirt was a comfortable dress blue, it was untucked, the sleeves were rolled up to his elbows and the first two buttons were undone.

“You’ll have to forgive Hester today. She’s herself.” his older brother teased and Hester said nothing, pinks lips quirked in a barely noticeable smile. Gadreel sat down next to Gabriel, worn sheets of what looked like symphonies in his hand, nodding to all of them before transfixing his gaze on the sheet music and zoning them all out. Introductions were made to Lucifer and Hester but the other family members seemed to be pointedly ignoring them. Gabriel again felt relief. Only two Novaks weren’t present as of yet, Metatron and Michael.

Causally, Gabriel let his hand fall to his lap then shift over to Sam’s knee. Sam sent a questioning glance but Hester asked him another question cutting off his own. Gabriel let his hand inch up just a little bit. 

Michael entered the room, talking heatedly with Lilith, no one except Lucifer was aware he had even entered the room. After a few more moments of arguing Lilith shook her head and left the room. Michael frowned to himself before it disappeared with a blank but neutral expression as he stepped further into the room and sat between Gadreel and Inias, across from Lucifer. Signature white dress shirt, tucked into his belt, sleeves rolled only once and one button undone. A knowing look and another mouthed “Later” then Lucifer didn’t keep blue eyes on Michael’s brown. Food was placed in front of everyone, more introductions and Michael was pleasant but he still seemed distant as if his role was only being half played while he lost himself into his thoughts and schemes.

Sam was talking to both Hester and Balthazar, about the architect, now. Gabe moved his hand up again, Sam glanced at him again, this one a mix between disbelief and arousal. No protest in sight. Gabriel grinned down into his food, his middle finger tracing the inseam if Sam’s jeans. It was, albeit, unequal to the slight privacy the veranda had offered but when Gabriel’s fingers brushed over Sam’s crotch, there was a definite yes to Gabriel’s attentions. His grin widened when Sam white knuckled the table cloth. He undid the button of Sam’s jeans with one hand while the other clasped a fork that he pushed around his food with. He slipped his hand into Sam’s boxers and his lover inhaled quickly but still no one seemed to notice anything so Gabriel wrapped his fingers around Sam’s length in a loose fist and stroked up, his fingers catching slightly. He frowned for a moment before rubbing his thumb over Sam’s tip, swiping away the pre-come already there and using that as lube, Sam muffling a little groan. Gabriel noticed Lucifer’s gaze on him and he had to fight the urge not to blush. 

He didn’t know. He couldn’t. Could he?

Gabriel let go of Sam’s cock, zipping and buttoning him back up. He wasn’t going to take a chance at this. Sam actually looked disappointed, Gabriel couldn’t blame him. He’d make it up to his lover later. His thoughts of how to get Sam to make those breathy little moans vanished when he realized that Lucifer and Michael were in the same room and were not arguing. Again, the question arose of what had changed came to the forefront of his mind but Cas asked him about some recipe for a certain kind of pie and the question was pushed away.

As soon as dinner was over and others started leaving, Sam stood up and grabbed his wrist tugging him out of the room. When they were out of earshot, Gabriel took the lead and changed who was pulling who “Sorry about earlier.” he mumbled and pushed Sam into an small dark hallway and pressing Sam up against the wall, unbuttoning Sam’s jeans again and shoving his hand down Sam’s boxers before kissing Sam fiercely ,setting an almost brutal pace. It was only maybe five strokes and Gabriel’s fingers twisting downward on each upward stroke and swiping over Sam’s tip before Sam came over Gabriel’s hand and in his boxers, moans swallowed by Gabe’s mouth, when they broke they both panted for air. Sam a bit more in need than Gabriel but still he mouthed against Gabe’s jaw, quick opened mouth kissing and light sucking as he asked “Why’d you stop?” referring to earlier.

Gabriel smiled lazily, the single glass of wine combined with this made his earlier enervation start returning like a freight train. “Wasn’t from lack of want. Lucifer. Staring at me. Was weird.” he mumbled barely forming sentences as he tiredly zipped Sam up for the second time. His fingers glistening with pearl streaks of come, he sucked on his index and middle finger suggestively and Sam groaned.

“You’re insatiable.” he muttered.

“You’re addictive.” Gabriel shot back.

Sam pushed to off the wall and linked their hands, scrunching up his nose “’M sticky.”

Gabriel nodded and they started walking again, this time actually making it to Gabriel’s rooms. 

Their luggage was there but Gabriel didn’t bother with it or even with the lights, Davos half awake on a couch. He led Sam into the bed room. “Strip.” he said, then walked out of the room and into the bathroom, flicking on a small light and turning on the warm water, letting run over a wash cloth before coming back to find a tired Sam pulling off tacky, ruined boxers. When they were disposed on the floor, Gabriel pushed him back onto the bed, wiping away the quickly drying come then throwing the wash cloth on top of the boxers. He stripped as well and tugged at Sam till the Winchester actually got under the silky blanket, curling up around Gabe as soon as he slid into the bed. 

Hazel eyes gazed at him from across a grossly soft pillow, everything seemingly shining in them. Gabriel smiled at him, kissing him again “Thanks. For coming with me.”

Sam smiled back, nodding. They both felt the end of the bed dip as Davos got up on the mattress with them, curling as much as possible and big brown eyes watched them for a moment then the Great Dane huffed a sigh that seemed to be filled with emotion and closed his eyes. Sam’s smile widened and his arm hugged Gabriel’s waist, pulling Gabe closer, Gabriel shoving his face into Sam’s neck.

The Novak fell asleep to both Sam’s and Davos’ breathing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so tired and I made them tired and for like the third time I'm such a horrible person I AM VERY SORRY THAT I LOST THE BET AND HAD TO CHANGE THE NAME AND CONFUSE EVERYONE and now hopefully I either pass out or directly inject caffeine into my bloodstream so I stay awake for my classes. This might run a little longer than part 1 simply because there's all this plot that I have to explain and lots of flashbacks and angst and fuck I'm sorry


	20. Was It the Wrong Thing To Assume?

It was morning. Monday morning, to be specific, Monday morning in Cas’ childhood home. The sunlight was muted through thick curtains and the even breathing of Dean’s snores kept him grounded in the awake world. He watched the rise and fall of Dean’s chest and the way his lips would twitch in half a smile but it would disappear as soon as it showed, his dream must be pleasant. Cas distantly wondered what it was about but mainly his mind stayed on what Dean had said yesterday before they left. He didn’t want to believe the given information but the way he had tested his unknowing brothers proved it to be true and that made a broken feeling bloom in his chest. It was almost suffocating. He had considered telling Dean but what could his lover do? Nothing. Just as Cas could say nothing. He couldn’t offer comfort and he had a feeling both brothers would reject it even if he could. He didn’t understand and he hated that. 

Confusion was probably his most bitter feeling and yet, it seemed to be the most prominent. He frowned and let a sigh take the air from his lungs. Balthazar and Gabriel both seemed to be relaxed at Dinner the other night and perhaps this was all a misunderstanding. Perhaps both him and Dean had read the signs completely wrong. He found himself clinging to that fickle trace of hope. He shoved all those thoughts away and turned so he was lying on his side and facing Dean. 

For awhile that staved off every other thought that didn’t involve Dean. He tried counting the soft almost invisible freckles but got distracted but another quirk of plush lips. His sandy blonde hair was mussed from sleep and sex. He remembered the first time he met Dean, that blonde hair was slicked with black slimy oil as were his biceps, his shirt, and his jeans not to mention there had been a smudge of the black fossil fuel on his chin. Cas still remembered the urge to wipe it away with his thumb and the surprise that quickly followed, he had never been attracted to men before Dean. But he had a feeling there wouldn’t be either gender now. Dean had successfully ruined him for any other person and he couldn‘t find it in himself to be anything but exultant with Dean for that. He felt a gentle smile stretch his own lips when eyelids fluttered to open into the murky room. A questioning eyebrow was raised, “How long have you been a creeper?” Dean’s sleepy voice rasped and Cas’ smile tugged a little further. 

“Not long.” he replied, his fingers coming up to splay against the morning stubble on Dean’s cheek. He still found it hard to believe Dean had kissed him at Crowley’s a week and a half ago today. Over a ridiculous karaoke song. God, he loved that song. 

Dean raised the other eyebrow as well “Oh, okay, then about an hour.” 

He laughed faintly “I don’t think so.”

“But you don’t know.” Dean mumbled, rolling so he was facing Cas.

Cas smiled indulgently “No. No, I don’t. I’m so very sorry to inconvenience you.”

Dean huffed out a breath that hit Cas’ face, “Said you were a creeper, didn’t say it was inconvenient.” he responded to the sarcasm by moving closer and entwining their legs.

“I’m so glad to please you, Dean.” Cas retorted, giving Dean a bland look at the cheesy grin Dean was giving him.

“Alright, so, you just woke up and decided to stare at my amazing good looks?” Dean asked, his lips still twisted with easy playfulness.

Castiel remained quiet, electing to let his gaze fall to the purple, red, and yellow marks on Dean’s neck than rather answer the question. It was nice like this and bringing up the other topic would just push this to the side while Dean got serious and tried to find a way to make Cas feel better. The problem was that he felt good now but he didn’t want to keep his worry a secret because that always seemed to increase it by tenfold. He looked back into shining green eyes and decided he would bring it up later. “Yes.”

Dean immediately frowned and Cas inwardly groaned at his lack of ability to tell a convincing lie when he desperately needed to. Dean‘s hand caught the one Cas had resting on his cheek “No. Tell me.”

Cas let his eyes fall shut and pressed the side of his head deeper into the pillow till bowed with the weight and encased half of his face. “Nothing important, Dean.”

“Yeah, well, tell me anyway.” Dean said, his hand pulling Cas’ away and interlocking their fingers. 

He opened his eyes and watched Dean for a moment before breathing out “They seem fine. I just…. I don‘t understand, Dean. I don‘t understand and that makes me so frustrated.”

Dean moved unfeasibly closer, until their warmth breath mingled together and their foreheads bumped, green eyes closed and a much contended sigh passed by those plush lips. “Then we were wrong. It wouldn’t be the first time. I told you, it could be anything.”

The hope seemed enriched by Dean’s words and stole more sustenance to feed the growing fire, Cas let his own eyes close again.

He was almost asleep when Dean mumbled “Is dinner gunna be like that every night? ‘Cause it’s a bit uncomfortable.”

He smiled; not bothering to open his eyes “No, Dean. They always do that the first night someone stays in the castle. Believe it or not, they aren’t as eccentric as you think.” then he reconsidered his words “Except Metatron. Stay away from his library and you’ll be fine.”

He heard his lover giggle like a child and peeked out through a half open eye and Dean was shaking his head “I won’t be going into any library anytime soon, Cas. Not in this Medieval lair.”

Cas stifled a groan. And he had been worried and Sam and Gabriel.


	21. A Savior Named After Satan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS: Child abuse (and like always its in italics so if you wanna skip it you can...)

Balthazar had efficiently wrapped himself into a cocoon of blankets and had, for the second night in a row, stayed stock still and painfully awake.

“I’m being ridiculous.” he huffed into his pillow, forcing his eyes closed again but one meaningless little creak of wood and they shot back open, his heartbeat pounding in his ears and his throat. 

“I was eleven. It happened once. I am a grown fucking man.” he mumbled to himself as he stood up, his body protesting with every tiny movement. The years seemed to be taking their toll but his mind was rejecting that any time had passed at all, as if when he left his room there would be someone out there. Waiting. He frowned and started curling his fingers up to dig into his palm, his fist tight and throbbing with the feeling of blood rushing around. He breathed in through his nose, trying for what had to be the infinite time to just forget.

\--------------------

 _It was unexpected. The fist to his jaw, the much bigger fist. It felt like a thousands tons, like an anvil and he staggered to the side before slumping against the wall. A hand clamped down on his shoulder, turning him and slamming his head back against the stone, his vision immediately blurring. The back of his head felt sticky, damp like there was liquid coming out. A fist was pulled back and the anvil hit his nose this time. He heard the gross sickening crack of cartilage and he whimpered, his hand going to the broken feature and cupping it gently. The hand was ripped away and the anvil hit him in the mouth this time, the bitter metallic taste of blood gushing from his shredded gums. He knew exactly who it was. But acknowledging it? That would be disastrous. “Please.”_

_“Don’t talk to your betters.” the voice snarled at him and the anvil hit his left cheek, the skin stretched across his cheek bone snapping when a ring dug into it and that started bleeding as well. He felt like he was being purposely drained of blood through the worst ways possible._

_He sank down untill he felt the cold stone floor. Hope that it was over started flowing through his mind but a powerful leg delivered a sharp kick to his ribs and he choked of the air he tried inhaling. Another kick. Another. He couldn’t feel the air anymore. Who had removed the oxygen? He needed that. Another kick, another sickening snap but much more pain followed that one, indescribable pain that made him shout it out and still he was having trouble sucking in air. He was going to die here. In some hallway. By his own brother._

_He waited for the next blow, the coming kick but instead his hazy vision was showing Raphael being torn away from him, a deep menacing voice growled out something unintelligible then a different sized blur was kneeling in front of him. He curled in on himself, trying to make himself smaller and pleaded again “Please don’t. I‘m sorry. I‘m sorry.”_

_“Hey. I won’t hurt you. I won't ever hurt you, Balthazar, I promise.” He felt a soft hand on his knee and apologies being whispered by the same voice that had made Raphael back down. He let himself try to relax and the hand was joined by another, one cupping his neck while the other gently touched the matted part of his hair. There was another low growl but it was replaced with the gentle voice again “Balthazar, look at me. You have to stay awake, little one.”_

_He tried nodding or answering, all that came out of his mouth was another shattered wince of pain. Raphael’s voice was suddenly there again and he hugged his knees to his chest “He’s a little brat. He deserved what he got.”_

_The caring hands disappeared and there was a strangled cut off sound taking Raphael’s voice away. His vision cleared enough to see, two pairs of feet, one planted firmly on the ground, the other kicking futilely in the air. “As will you.” the growl said. Raphael was dropped to the floor, breathing hard and fast._

_The soothing voice returned to kneeling in front of him “I’m going to have to move you, little one. I’m afraid this might hurt.” but as soon as Balthazar’s vision straightened momentarily and he saw the strong neck and calloused hands, he locked his arms around the neck and starting crying into it._

_Strong arms slid under his knees and cupped the back of his head, picking him up. He was losing consciousness fast but he heard the barked order “You stay where you are, Raphael. I swear on every damn soul there is and Michael‘s god, if you move or try running, I’ll make sure you won’t walk ever again.”_

\-----------------------

He had woken up in his own room after that, Gabriel and Anna tending to him and scolding him about picking fights with the local children. He had never had the heart to correct Gabe and let his brother and sister wrap every wound, keeping his noises of pain to himself.

Balthazar growled and ran both hands through his hair. There was a time when he thought his rescuer had been Gabriel but after discreet prodding that was out of the picture, his next assumption was Michael but again that seemed unlikely. 

Now, he was back here again. The same situation as before, only three people to know of the incident and the heavy air of a repeat was sneaking Balthazar’s sleep and peace of mind away from him. He paced around for a little while, his curiosity growing and growing while his dread seemed to latch on with it making everything swirl together. It didn’t seem fair, really, for him to have literally survived this place, to have tasted the numbness and high that heroin offered and rejected, to have finally made a life for himself and possessed a job and _happiness_ , only to be shoved back into his original fear. 

He was alive at least, but thanks to whom? And for how long? He had seen the look in Raphael’s eyes, it was the one thing on earth he couldn’t ever forget, it had been burned into his own retinas. It was disturbing and thirsty. He would try again. He might even succeed. 

Balthazar swallowed thickly and walked over to the dresser, kneeling and opening the bottom drawer. A black velvet box about the size of a large book was half hidden beneath some old shirts, he pulled it out carefully. He opened it and felt a little bit of relief and fire return to him, it was only a simple knife, encased in a leather sheath, but the protection it offered let Balthazar feel the weight of sleep suddenly trying to collapse him. Gripping the handle, he crawled back into his nest of blankets.

He knew he would have to get up soon, in less than an hour or someone would come and wake him up but any sleep was worth it. The fading images of some nameless protector were the last thing that passed through the synapses of his brain before sleep pulled him down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinda had a break down so sorry the chapters are short. Also I may go on a little break because as you can tell I need to rediscover and pull my muse out of the fucking well it jumped in. again I'm sorry to bother you people with my writing okay


	22. Let's Have A Discussion

The hallways were clear. Most everyone was in their respective rooms and the morning was quiet. Peaceful, even. He hoped it lasted. But with Raphael disappearing from the security cameras view for hours on end and Lucifer trailing after Michael meant that the two oldest were thoroughly distracted by each other and had left the fourth eldest to his own machinations. Which meant following their corrupt Father’s orders. Orders. He let out an angry breath; Gadreel scanned quickly over the monitors one last time before standing up and leaving the security room, locking the door. When he turned around Metatron stood there, peering into his soul. At least that’s what it always felt like. “Do you need something?” he asked, frankly annoyed. It was much too early and he had yet to find a decent cup of coffee. He also needed his three eldest brothers to agree on this one thing before the fourth tore down the fantasy everyone had been living in. 

“You’ve been avoiding me as of late.” the shorter said, grumpily “Was it something I said?” 

Gadreel for once wished that the previous question was indeed sarcasm instead of Metatron’s weird link with Gadreel but nevertheless “No. I have business to attend to.” he mumbled, going around Metatron but the bookworm caught the inside of his elbow.

“I’m not the bad guy this time around. Besides, the last time was ….an accident. You sure you can handle everyone on everyone else?” his brother’s voice said, trying to yet again manipulate Gadreel.

He instinctively stiffened and turned his head to glare. “You told the youngest of all of us that Father was still alive. I fail to see how that is an accident.”

Metatron shrugged “I didn’t lie.”

He closed his eyes and forced the growing anger to dissipate “You have always envied Castiel. Father is as good as dead, giving ghost orders to ghost soldiers.” he stepped into Metatron’s personal space, despite his slight fondness of Metatron, the shorter man had a habit of ruining every well planned scheme and another reason was Gadreel placed absolutely no trust in him “You have no side. Go back to your library.” then he freed his arm and walked away.

He recalled seeing Michael passed out in the study through one of the security cams and heading for the place Michael seemed to be sleeping more and more in. It wasn’t too far away and he reached the doors that matched the first doors of the castle. He knocked softly then opened the door; it creaked slowly as he stepped in the study. He closed the door behind him.

He couldn’t help but smirk at his brother’s position as he neared the sofa. Michael was half way off the couch as it was, on his belly with his left arm and leg off the sofa, the other arm was being used as a pillow for his head. Overall, he looked much younger than he was and the phone that was being clutched in the left hand was showing the low battery warning. “Michael.” he said, his voice firm and a bit loud. Yesterday had been eye-opening to say the least. He thought back to the motel room and changed his view, Michael wouldn't sneer. He'd nod and avoid him. Michael was.....closed off from most. 

“Shuddap, Lu.” Michael mumbled, his face pressed into his arm and his eyebrows bent down in frustration from being woken from what had to be a very uncomfortable sleep. 

“Michael.” he repeated, peeved that he had to.

“Fuck, Lucifer, what?!” the elder sat up and rubbed at his eyes then shoved both hands through the dark hair making it stick up and resembling nothing like the normal combed style. Gadreel raised an eyebrow but said nothing. Tired brown eyes looked him over and Michael sighed heavily. “You aren’t Lucifer.” 

“No. I am unaware of the location of your would-be lover. We need to discuss some things.” Gadreel said, bypassing the fact that Michael rarely ever cursed. 

The brown eyes glared at Gadreel “He isn’t my lover.”

“Why haven‘t you been sleeping in your room?” he asked and the other’s gaze was averted immediately.

The elder stood up and stretched, yawning, and ignoring the comment altogether. He sighed again as if everything was such a challenge; perhaps it was where Michael is concerned. He looked back over to Gadreel “Watcher, it’s barely daylight. Am I allowed some coffee first? Has anybody even been to the kitchen yet?”

Michael was being very relaxed which was not as surprising as it could be. Gadreel had seen this side of the eldest Novak multiple times with Lucifer, the maid, and when she was still here, Anna. He had a feeling they were substituting him for Gabriel and he let them. Hopefully, once this was over they wouldn’t be two Michaels. He would admit that he preferred this one to the one that everyone else saw and his stomach growled loudly at the mention of the kitchen and coffee. Michael sent him a grin. “I’ll take that as a no. We can talk about Gabriel later. Besides, Lucifer will need to be there.”

Gadreel broke easily and nodded, returning the smile. “What has you in such a good mood?” he asked and Michael shrugged.

“How do you not even react that Lucifer wants to….?”

He shook his head “Morals are pesky things that I’ve seem to have lost quite a few years ago. Be thankful. Besides, I doubt any could deny Mephistopheles wishes.” he said, crooking his smile into a smirk.

Michael snorted. “You know that’s not his name.”

“Yes, but the Leader of the Fallen Angels is so much more romantic than Nick.” Gadreel replied.

Michael shrugged “I don’t mind Nick.”

“I should hope not.” said a voice standing in the doorway and Gadreel turned to look at Lucifer who, of course, was staring directly into Michael’s brown eyes which had become wide and blown and yet his face only showed irritation. Gadreel had to give credit to Michael; the eldest knew some things about masking. But, lately, when it involved Lucifer, he was slipping. Drastically, so.

“I didn’t know that “later” meant morning.” Gadreel quipped and Lucifer dropped the gaze like it meant nothing but Gadreel knew better.

Lucifer‘s Adam‘s apple bobbed as he swallowed and abruptly cold eyes settled on Gadreel “Yes, well, there wouldn’t have to be a “later” if you hadn’t interrupted.” 

“It was that or Raphael threatening them again. Who told him to go to that town in the first place?” Gadreel shot back, not to be worn down by Lucifer.

“They assumed it was me, no doubt.” Michael mumbled, falling back on the sofa.

“Whose fault is that?” Lucifer asked coming to sit down next to him while Gadreel took an armchair.

Michael huffed and moved away from Lucifer. Lucifer just grinned and moved with him, making Michael glare at him; his frustration with Lucifer’s attentions was getting worse. Gadreel rolled his eyes “Children.” he grumbled about their actions and Lucifer held up his hands.

“Fine, killjoy. What is it you wanted to talk about?”

“Father is aware there are easier ways to change a will?” Gadreel asked, knowing the answer and getting a blank stare for his efforts. “You are blind.” he said to the both of them. “This-” he motioned to them “This is getting in the way. You either fuck or leave each other alone, do you understand? Raphael is willing to kill and possibly die just for the sake of some last order. Gabriel needs to know about that. About everything.” 

“Weren’t you just as willing a couple years ago?” Michael asked, eyes glued to the floor.

Gadreel sighed “I was….” his eyes flickered toward Lucifer and the second grinned at him. “Convinced, otherwise.”

Michael’s head shot up, his glare directed at Lucifer before standing up “We had an agreement.” Michael said in that voice and Gadreel watched the relaxation and ease slip away to be replaced by tension and rage. But Michael’s facial expression remained calm, in a very upsetting way “Apparently, it’s now void.”

Lucifer frowned instantly and stood but Michael’s strong hand pushed him back down onto the couch. Gadreel looked away, awkwardly, getting up and leaving the room. Lucifer gave a confused and even pleading look but Michael just continued to glare. “You swore to me, Lucifer.”

Then blue eyes turned to cold flames and Lucifer glared back “And you? Who did you swear to, brother? Oh, that’s right, Father. You were the one who voided the agreement so don’t look at me with such judgment. You. Left. Me.”

“I didn’t have a choice! He wouldn’t have….” but Michael trailed off, he wouldn’t bring up that night in an argument. Over some petty disagreement. That would be cruel and it wasn’t material to be thrown at Lucifer at Michael‘s whim. He had done it willingly. He had to. He looked away from Lucifer, subtly announcing the conversation was over but Lucifer remained in his seat.

Michael scoffed and took the arm chair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still kinda only half of a muse here but oh well


	23. If Only I Could

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mentions of Child Abuse, Injuries, Mentions of self harm...

He wasn’t quite sure what he was supposed to do in this situation. He was hungry and the tacky taste of sleep was still coating his mouth. He wanted coffee. But sharp blue eyes made him stay in the armchair, held down by guilt and undertones of lust. 

Lucifer had spread his legs and started tapping both his hand and his foot, his other hand pressed into the side of his mouth to prop his head up, looking bored. 

In truth, Michael _had_ left. Against all promises, he had left. He knew he would be excused if he told just exactly _why_ he had left. He didn’t want to be excused, didn’t deserve it. His eyes went to Lucifer while the other was distracted and they caught on raised pink skin on the underside of Lucifer’s wrist and he immediately looked away. He didn’t deserve to be excused.

\-------------------  
 _Michael never would have thought that…. This was barbaric and vile and it was the Man’s child! How could He even do this?!_

_Lucifer was about three floors below Michael, in a small room that offered no light and the food was kept to the barest minimum. He was in a cage. A small, uncomfortable, empty, little, prison without Michael to soothe him. Michael, himself, hadn’t eaten in days. That was his punishment for the late night excursion. He raked his hands through his hair, his nails scraping at his scalp as he sat in the corner of his locked room, rocking back and forth. He fancied he could hear Lucifer’s pleas. He needed to get to his brother. He needed to make sure that their Father stayed away from Gabriel. But the ache for Lucifer was something a bit stronger than protectiveness, to the point it could be called possessiveness and feral but it was eating at him while he ate nothing and covered his arms in claw marks because he had started scraping at himself so hard. “Lu. Lu, I’m sorry.” he whimpered into the empty room, the double beds glaring out the missing occupant. “I’m so sorry.”_

_A whole castle and Lucifer agreed to stay close to Michael. Sacrificing privacy for a newfound intimacy that they didn’t share before Heaven was complete. That had been years ago, back when they had secretly hoped the castle would live up to its name. What fools they had been, Michael thought bitterly. But then again, they were only children. They were barely older than children now. He whimpered louder, hoping his Father would perchance hear and take pity, letting them out._

_Letting them out. Like they needed to be locked up in the first place? They weren’t monsters. Maybe He should be locked up. No. No. Can’t think like that._

_A key turned in the locked and a girl with dirt smudged onto her face poked her head and a lantern in the door way to stare at Michael before saying in a low voice “It’s very late, sir. The castle is asleep, sir. We haven’t much time….sir.”_

_Michael hated that word; he was no one’s superior. “I’m a year older than you. I’m not ‘sir’.” he mumbled into his arms._

_She looked out into the hall and checked it before looking back with a dark kind of flame in her eyes “Then get your ass over here before somebody catches us. He’s hurt badly and no one’s even sent a doctor.” she growled at him but when she opened her mouth to say more a smaller boy that Michael immediately recognized scurried into the room, wide golden eyes brightening immeasurably when he saw Michael. The boy ran to him and threw small arms around his neck “I not seen you for yyyyeeeaaarrss, Micha.”_

_He couldn’t help the smile on his lips as he hugged Gabriel back before swooping up the toddler despite his weakened body’s protest. He opened a drawer and threw the contents of a first aid kit in a bag then nodding sharply to the maid as they both slipped into the darkened hall and headed for a winding stairwell that lead to the pitch of rows and rows of old useless prisons cells. He felt Gabriel press against him and he held onto the boy tighter as Gabriel whispered “We breaking rules, aren’t we? I like that. We going to see Luci? ” and Michael couldn’t scold the boy because who didn’t in this household? Who didn’t want to break the rules here? In this nightmare._

_“Yes, we are going to see Lucifer.” and saying it made his heart beat speed up and switch tempos but he followed Lilith further into the darkness until they were in a hallway that was completely empty. It had taken this long to get here. No matter how hard Michael could have listened, Lucifer’s screams would be lost into the many identical hallways and corridors. He set Gabriel down and clamped his hands over the small boy’s ears. “Is he bleeding? Is he wounded?”_

_She nodded yes to both and Michael gave her Gabriel‘s pudgy little hand and knelt to look into the golden eyes. “I have to…talk to Lucifer alone for a few minutes, okay? You obey.”_

_Gabriel nodded vigorously, dirty blonde hair falling into his face. Michael brushed it back before pressing his lips to Gabriel’s forehead and stood, looking menacingly at Lilith. “If you hear anything, you run. You take him and run. You don’t let anyone find you down here. I need to clean and dress his wounds, if Lucifer starts making noise, you don’t let the boy hear them.” he instructed under his breath before marching down into the darkness, toward the very last cell, gripping the bag of gauze and other medicinal supplies he had grabbed._

_He could hear Gabriel’s inquisitive conversation but the closer he got to the cage the more the sound of labored breathing overtook his little brother’s voice, he stopped and felt guilt start to swallow him again but he shook himself and ran the rest of the way, wrenching the cell door open and going the old cot Lucifer laid on and sank down to his knees in front of his brother._

_Lucifer’s face was bruised, more than it had already been, the bruise that had already formed around his eye had darkened with sickening colors, the side of his forehead had deep cuts that would scar and his jaw was littered with purplish indentations, his nose was bloody. His eyes were closed but under his eyelids they moved restlessly, he was in a state of unconsciousness and he was sweating buckets in the damp air of the prison, he had a fever and besides his previous bear trap injury there were two thick notches into his wrist and blood was dripping down onto the dungeon‘s floor, splattering against stone and a broken shard of glass. Thick, ugly, cuts that would leave angry red scars in their wake and Michael didn’t hold back the wet prickling tears as he began to clean the wounds and whispering harshly for water down the hallway then prayed to whatever deity existed that Lilith had heard him. The thing about the cuts, the deep nasty things, was that they looked very much self inflicted. In fact, it would have been ludicrous to assume otherwise. It hadn’t been deep enough to nick that artery that ran to Lucifer’s heart but it was close, if the amount of blood at Michael’s knees was anything to go by. “Lu, oh god, what have you done, Lu?” he asked through clenched teeth as he dumped the contents of the bag onto the stone floor. He had lost blood, lots of it and his other arm was twisted into such a wrong angle . Michael was fairly sure his brother had gone into shock._

_Lilith appeared and a Gabriel clinging to her jeans with orders to keep his eyes shut tight, completely unaware of the state of things around him as Lilith handed Michael two bowls of hot and cold water. She covered the boy’s ears again and whispered “He was fighting Him and. . .your Father grabbed his arm and pulled it behind his back. I think it’s broken. I don‘t known where he got the glass, I‘m sorry I didn‘t come to you sooner.” he didn’t bother to thank her for the water or the information, just motioning to Gabriel and the other end of the hall. She gently took the young boy’s hand and led him from the cage as Michael placed a cold rag on his brother’s forehead. He wrapped the cuts fully, hiding the marks from his sight after cleaning them. He started to wipe away the dried blood from the first injury; he finished disinfecting it and wrapped the foot. He moved to Lucifer’s arm and no longer tried swallowing his panic. He put some gauze in between his brother‘s teeth and touched around the break slightly, drawing hisses of pain. He clenched his hands into fists, he would have to set the bone before he could put it in a sling. Thankful that Gabriel had been dragging medical books around, he took a deep breath. “I‘m afraid this might hurt.” he mumbled to Lucifer. He kneeled so he was almost straddling Lucifer and took a deep breath before setting the bone back into it’s place._

_The cry was harsh and Michael had to keep his hands on Lucifer’s shoulders so the younger didn’t push him off. Pale eyes opened into the darkness, Lucifer’s pupils nothing more than tiny black dots surrounded by fields of grey and blue and ice. The labored breathing seemed to get infinitely heavier, he gazed around wildly and the delirium Michael could see in those eyes scared him. The ice blue eyes swerved toward Michael and the breathing slowed down as the craziness fell away. “Mi-Micha? But…“ Lucifer swallowed, his voice hoarse but he continued, not letting Michael push him back down on the cot._

_“He said you didn’t….You didn’t care….That you wanted to leave without me.…said you thought I’d be better off dead… I‘m so cold. Micha, don‘t leave me. I‘m sorry for what I did. Just…please…don‘t leave me. He said you were going away. Micha?” Lucifer asked, using his name again and again as if he thought he was talking to simply an illusion. Michael’s eyes fell shut and more water escaped them. He made some awkward turns in even more angles before he was under Lucifer, pulling his brother on top of him, wiping away the sweat once more and forcing Lucifer’s head onto Michael’s shoulder. His body heat would have to be enough; he hadn’t thought to bring a blanket._

_“He lied, Lucifer.” he couldn’t find anything else to say but pulled his brother closer and said what was on repeat in his mind “This is my fault, this is all my fault, Lu.”_

_He felt Lucifer’s hand grab the arm Michael had around his chest, the bandages on Lucifer’s arm catching on Michael’s as the younger squeezed. “I love you, Micha.”_

_The tone of voice, the way it was said, Michael knew it wasn’t like the love he had for Gabriel, it wasn’t something they could have but he was in a grime covered dungeon with the only person he should have left this place for and that person may not last the night if the fever didn’t break within the hour so all that was in his mind was guilt and rebellion at the thought of upholding any moral integrity and auspicious bursts of half-mad happiness when his conscious died away. “I love you too, Lucifer.”_

_He closed his eyes again and felt as though the tears were making their own scars as they ran down his face to drip onto his shirt and into his brother’s hair. Lucifer’s tongue flicked out to lick dry, cracking, lips and chuckled weakly, coming back into his personality “Not a very good son, now. In love with your brother. But we aren’t. Not really. Not by blood.”_

_He blinked and looked down at the blue almost grey eyes looking up “I knew, I found out a day after you did. You walked around looking so pale and …..scared and I thought it was me. That I had finally obeyed one order too many ….I have now though, haven‘t I? Christ, Lu, I‘m never-I can’t-I won’t leave you. I won‘t ever leave you.”_

_Lucifer looked tired, weaker, when he answered with a lazy smile that was taken away by a coughing fit that brought bright red blood sparkling against his lips and Michael felt the panic return because that didn’t make sense, why would he be bleeding internally and Michael would need to- but Lucifer held him fast when he tried to get up for help “I might be the one leaving you by the way it looks, Michael…..” and a shaky hand came up to tangle in his hair “It wouldn’t matter….to me. It wouldn’t matter if you were blood or not.”_

_They both knew Michael wouldn’t say it aloud but the look they shared said everything. It had never mattered. “What will I tell Gabriel if you go?” Michael asked, gulping in musty air. Go? He’d never been one to sugar coat anything._

_Lucifer loved telling stories to the younger, grand adventures and even more spectacular heroes that may or may not be named after the three of them. Gabriel was usually the healer of the story at the boy’s insistence. Lucifer was a trade between the villain, the knight and the damsel also at the boy’s insistence. But they both agreed that Michael would be the hero, the Prince that would come to their aid. Lucifer smiled softly, his eyes half lidded now “Tell him I was captured. That I’m in a huge prison especially designed for me, keeping my powers at bay and you’ll come rescue me soon.”_

_He pulled out from his brother a little till he was lying on his side next to Lucifer but the younger had passed out again. He had a feeling he knew the only way to get help for his brother would be something just as twisted as the cage around them. But he wasn’t going to let Lucifer die in some dungeon from injures bartered off their prick of a Father. He pulled away from the cot and stood._

\---------------

“Michael!”

He looked up from the random designs on the carpet to Lucifer’s interested gaze. And while Lucifer didn’t quite remember all that happened during that night, Michael hadn’t forgotten one anguished second. Maybe that was for the best. He was up and half way to the kitchen with Lucifer right behind him before either spoke. A hand seized his in an iron clamp and he stared down at it before looking warily up at Lucifer. 

“Michael.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All mistakes are mine, kudos and comments are loved...and hopefully (cross your fingers) i can finish this fic before the premiere :3


	24. Spit It Out

Gabe and Sam’s morning had been slow and after too many teasing kisses, it had lead to some pretty satisfying shower sex as well. Gabriel knew that _every_ chance they got wasn’t exactly healthy but he really didn’t mind that much. Being with Sam, and yes, sometimes just _being_ , had made stress that used to follow him around start to ease off his heels and as if mirroring that effect, Sam had been sleeping sounder. True, the nightmares still came but last night was only a minor one and Sam had barely stirred, Gabriel had woken up but that was due to the fact that his sleep had already been light. Some thing in this place, this strange, terrifying, place, was horribly, horribly, off. 

He didn’t mean Michael. He didn’t even mean Lucifer. Just the whole vibe the air seemed to be giving off was thick and ready to burst with some kind of evil plot. He had tried brushing it off and continuing as normal but when he and Sam had ventured down to the kitchen, where they were now, Balthazar had jumped when they appeared in the doorway. As if someone was after him but when Gabriel tried to ask him about it, he bolted.

He stood by a small island, nose half way into his coffee cup and breathing in every small scent of the flavored caffeine he could while Sam shook his head and took another spoonful of cereal into his mouth. “This isn’t a cheesy black and white horror flick from the 70’s, Gabe. No one’s out to get us.” he mumbled.

But the Winchester hadn't made to protest when Gabriel had put the .45’s in the bedside table’s drawer next to the lube and hadn’t hassled Gabriel when the Novak wouldn’t let Sam smoke by himself. Whether he would admit it or not, Sam knew as well as Gabriel the whole castle seemed to be in argument with itself just like its inhabitants. Some dark kind of history was trying to claw its way back into the spotlight and was dragging most of the Novaks with it. “’course there isn’t, Samsquatch.” Gabe agreed.

While all this was a very pressing issue, there was something else that Gabe had ignored, he squeezed the cup in his hands and took another breath “Sam.”

The Winchester looked up from his cereal with an easy smile “Yeah?”

“Sam, two nights ago, I….I mean, you were-”

“Michael.” 

The other voice cut Gabriel off and both he and Sam looked toward the hallway, Sam looked back to Gabe with a questioning look and he shrugged going over to the doorway.

A little ways down the hall Michael and Lucifer stood at a stand still with all three of their gazes staring at Michael’s hand in Lucifer’s. Michael’s stare shifted to the floor before pulling his hand away and turning to keep walking. He walked right passed Gabriel and into the kitchen with Sam, not offering an explanation. Lucifer hadn’t moved, freezing when he noticed Gabriel, some kind of pain in those pale eyes but it was gone and so was Lucifer before Gabriel could even blink.

He licked his lips and turned back into the kitchen but Michael was gone as well. He raised an eyebrow at Sam “Did he come in here?”

Sam pushed out his lips and nodding “Yeah, told me good morning, got some coffee, and I think a bagel then took off. Why?”

Gabriel opened his mouth to explain but what would he be explaining, he didn’t know what he saw. “I don’t know.” he hummed, looking back out into the hallway but it held only a grinning Dean and Cas, now.

Cas smiled happily at Gabriel and patted his shoulder and Gabe pulled a face, “Why don’t you two just exchange vows, already?” he muttered, still a bit peeved at his brother for saying _it_ so soon while Gabriel could only seem to stutter over his words.

Dean and Cas both blushed and Dean mumbled something about pancakes, turning to root the fridge and Cas sat down at the island next to Sam. He snatched the coffee pot and a cup for himself, trying to fight the blush. Sam was sending Gabriel one of those scolding looks that seemed to say “Don’t break them this early.” 

Gabriel just pointed to his own chest and raised both eyebrows, feigning innocent and Sam eyes narrowed, nodding.

“At least we don’t have a silent language.” Dean said after a few more vague gestures caught both his and Cas’ confused attention. Sam shrugged and Gabriel rubbed the back of his neck, looking away.

“Whatever. You want some pancakes?” Dean asked the room as he started mixing the ingredients and Sam stood, walking over to the sink and filling the empty bowl with water before shaking his head. Gabriel puffed out his cheeks “Nah, thanks for the offer.” 

He left the kitchen, Sam padding after him, gaze glued to the décor and Gabriel felt a perfidious joy that maybe Sam had completely forgotten their earlier conversation. They stood only a few feet outside the kitchen. “You want to see the library?” he asked, trying to keep the subject away for now and felt like the animated candlestick in _Beauty and the Beast_ previous topic is forbidden. He quirked his lips at that but it grew into a genuine smile when he saw Sam’s features light up.

“ _Yeah_ enthusiasm in his voice and Gabriel laughed. 

“Bit of a nerd, aren’t you?” he teased but Sam shook his head.

“Not as much as Dean is.” argued Sam.

“It’s pop culture! There is a difference, Sammy!” the older brother called. 

Gabriel snorted. “C’mon. I’ll show you, anyway.”

They were maybe halfway to the library when Sam brought the topic up again, despite Gabriel’s hopes “What were you trying to say earlier?” the soft baritone voice asked, the tone was what Sam used when he wanted and Gabriel bit hard at his bottom lip.

“Nothing that can’t wait, Samsquatch.” he replied and Sam pursed his lips but nodded, letting Gabriel link their hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> arugh short chapters! Blah! :P


	25. Drunken Birds

The library, like every other main room in the castle, was magnificent. A wrought iron spiral staircase for three levels of books and shelves and random placed comfortable chairs. The staircase was a complete spiral, unlike the one in Sam’s apartment that was only half and normal wood. The first floor had a fireplace and a nice deep red sofa that cushioned every little dip to you when you sat down, two black leather armchairs across from each other. The whole room was shaped like an old Broadway theater with the fireplace in place of a stage and surrounded by books and to the right side a ladder. The rest had small but numerous rows of books with choice positioned alcoves that would be in the box seats if it was indeed a theater. Either way the wall couldn’t be seen, only books.

Sam took in a deep breath at least twice as he made a circle so he could capture everything with his gaze while Gabriel had taken a seat on the sofa and started annoying a reading Hester. A little to the right of the stage, if you will, by the ladder was a grand piano. Sheet music on the opened and a guitar in it’s opened case next to one of its legs. Gadreel, who was no doubt the musician for the ivory keys, was making his way down the spiraled staircase, looking intently involved in yet another piece of music, although this one was a page in a great tome of arrangements. He hummed happily and shut it, dust coming off with the resounding snap of old pages and looked up at the new residents. “Hello.” he greeted, setting the book down on the second to the last step and heading over to the waiting piano. “Just exploring, today then?” he asked, though the answer seemed a bit obvious.

Gabriel didn’t bother answering; pointing out that _The Man on the Box_ seemed like light reading for Hester. The blonde shook her head and put a spare piece of paper between the worn pages and turned to argue with Gabe about her choice of reading.

Sam pulled his gaze away from the bickering pair to nod at Gadreel who inclined his head with a friendly smile and sat down on the piano bench. Sam rubbed at his palm for a moment, indecision running through his mind before heading over to stand behind Gadreel. The man flexed his fingers delicately, ran his tongue over his lips in a quick succession than let his fingers rest causally on the keys as if familiarizing himself. When the other voices died away he began to play, his fingers nimble and quick but the music asked for piano forte so it was a soft melody filling up the theater of a library.

When Gadreel was maybe halfway through Sam couldn’t help but ask “Is that Chopin?”

The music cut off and the other conversation picked up again. Gadreel looked up at him with surprise. “Supposedly most akin to. Forgive me, but you don’t seem like…” the other trailed off and frowned to himself while Sam shrugged. 

“I knew a guy, lived with him for a couple months.” Sam offered the vague explanation and the other conversation abruptly ended when Gabriel wandered over to Sam with a curious expression. Sam laughed lightly and tugged his lover away as Gadreel started playing again.

Gabriel wanted to ask. There were so many questions racing through his mind. Hadn’t Sam said he had never woken up next to someone?

Sam’s hands came to cup his face and big eyes sparkled amusement at the Novak’s reaction “Breathe, Gabe.” 

Gabriel deliberately huffed out a breath that hit Sam’s mouth and the other wrinkled his nose. Gabriel smirked but it was quickly kissed away, when Sam pulled away Gabriel had to repeat Sam’s statement in his mind and sucked in a quick supply of air.

“It was just a roommate when I was down in Brazil. That’s all. He played for a local bar most nights but during the afternoon when it was hot out and nobody came the bartender let him play whatever he wanted. I just happened to be the bartender.” Sam gave, but there was still something in the way Sam talked about Brazil that set Gabriel off on a whole different trail of questions that didn’t seem right to ask. He nodded his reluctant acceptance.

“Do you know how to dance, Sam?” he asked, the music easily reminded him that there would most likely be some kind of party before they left.

Sam’s eyebrows shot up “What, like the waltz?”

Gabriel shrugged “There’s others but yeah, like that.”

Sam chuckled as if it was a joke but when Gabriel’s whiskey eyes showed no signs of teasing Sam let the sarcastic smile on his lips as he started shaking his head “Oh no. There isn’t any way you can get me to look like some unbalanced duck in tux, mind you, just because you want me to twirl around the room.”

“Well, the first thing I have to argue is that I would eventually find _some_ -” and he waggled his eyebrows, because really, Sam was asking for that “-way to get you to dance. Secondly, I would be your partner so, no, you wouldn’t look like a drunken bird. Thirdly, my Samuel, I happen to enjoy twirling around the room. C’mon, Sammy, it would be fun.” he pouted.

The Winchester shook his head “Making a fool of myself isn’t fun.” 

“Look, I’m sure there’s an empty room somewhere in this place. I could teach you. Or….” Gabe drew out the word “I could dance with someone else.”

Sam immediately frowned and Gabriel had to resist the giddy smile “Fine. One lesson. But if I’m horrible I’m not doing it.”

“Blah blah, all I heard was yes. Stay around here, okay? I’ll come get you when I’m ready.” he leaned up and pressed a quick kiss to Sam’s lips before leaving him alone with Hester and Gadreel.

\--------------------- 

Balthazar’s hands were starting to shake. It was barely noticeable really but in the state his mind was in it was drastically annoying and would quickly draw attention to him. Although he was doing that anyway. He kicked himself internally and lifted a hand to shove it through his tangled hair as he leaned up against the wall. Catching his breath that was already stable. Everything about this place made his skin crawl.

There was the quickened sound of hurried footsteps and Bal felt his heartbeat start pounding hard in his chest as he turned to look to his right but nothing was there and he considered that he had it had just been his very active imagination. 

Except there was suddenly a cool metal pressed against the middle of his back that he had learned all to well. It was pressed hard into his skin and if he wasn’t dead in a few minutes there would be a small circular bruise in its place. He frowned and let a shaking breath out “You’re going to shoot me in the back? I knew you were a coward, Zach, but really? So melodramatic. ” he said, sounding bored.

It wasn’t Raphael; the man would make sure Balthazar was looking right at him if he did trying killing the bartender. That only left Zachariah, Virgil wasn’t that pliable but Zachariah was. He felt some stupid bravado build up in his throat and couldn’t help that the fool’s bluster offered some comfort to him. He stood straight and waited for a few moments, nothing in them but silence and suddenly the pressure was gone and there was the sound of someone receding but Balthazar remained where he was. Breathing uneven and eyes squeezed shut, head tilted back. 

Gabriel was the first person he saw when he opened his eyes again, the older brother coming towards him with a worried expression. “Balthazar, what the hell is going on with you?” Gabriel asked when he reached Bal.

Balthazar let out another precarious breath “Oh, not much, just reacquainting myself with bad memories.” he said, rolling his lips together then stretching them into a believable smile.

Gabriel sighed, knowing the lie when he saw it “Fine, don’t tell me.” he quipped but put a hand on Balthazar shoulder and squeezed gently. Balthazar just raised an eyebrow and watched Gabe walk off. 

The question was in his mind, would they try again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know, I legit thought no one would ever want to read this....thanks for everthing and I'm really sorry but this is causimg me to much stress I had anxiety over this and the whole point of my writing fanfic is to get rid of some of that pressure and I promise I'll make it up to you guys some how but I'm done. I'm sorry. Also _The Man on the Box_ is by Harold MacGrath and was published around 1904....not a very long book but certainly worth the read ...


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